No matter what they take from me, they can’t take away my dignity,
Because the greatest love of all is happening to me.
I found the greatest love of all inside of me.
The greatest love of all is easy to achieve!
Learning to love yourself, it is the greatest love of all.
– Linda Creed (1948-1986), from “The Greatest Love of All” (1977)
One of the most important tasks that each of us faces is our need to create a positive and wholly reality-based relationship with ourselves. Until we can know and be comfortable with who we actually are, it is hard for us to have the clarity, the self-confidence, and the daily peace that we are going to need if we are ever to really make the most of our lives. At first, as the song says, this doesn’t seem to be much of a problem. After all, since we spend a lot of time with ourselves, we should know ourselves pretty well by now. But for nearly everyone, our adult self-image is built on erroneous information and distorted assumptions that unfortunately have shaped our whole lives to date. For example:
- Some of us never learn to tame our needy egos. The ego is a primitive instinct for self-preservation and self-aggrandizement that is part of our limited minds at birth, and that seems to be essential if we are to avoid a host of childhood dangers. It functions almost like a separate being that tells us that the ego itself, this fearful and grabby little gremlin, actually is who we are; and if we continue to believe that, we can grow up to be unpleasantly shallow and self-absorbed. Fortunately, though, our ego can be tamed once we reach young adulthood, and then it will no longer much distract us.
- Traditional Christianity and mainstream science combine to give us an awful self-image. If we believe them, we internalize the fear-based certainty that we are sinful and fallen meat that will blink out when our bodies die, or else we will likely burn in hell forever. Even the best-case possibility that we might be lucky enough to spend eternity playing harps in God’s throne room starts to seem pretty lousy when you envision living it forevermore.
* Our view of ourselves is heavily shaped by our cultures. We can see this phenomenon most clearly in the lesser status of women in some cultures, and in the way that indicators of wealth and class can affect our sense of who we are. We even are marked for life by subtle details like birth-order and city-vs.-country. Then on top of all that is piled our online culture, which strokes and batters our egos as it grotesquely distorts the way we see ourselves and plays havoc with what might otherwise have been our life’s more solid and well-considered priorities.
- Our families were the first to tell us who we are, and we still believe most of whatever they said. I see this as the big one! Too many little children uncritically learn to see themselves negatively, and some of them spend all the rest of their lives still knowing that they are clumsy, not smart enough, inconvenient, or even flat-out bad people, simply because they heard words like these from a parent before the age of six. I had the opposite upbringing. My father wanted me to be the first female American President, and my mother wanted me to write the Great American Novel, so from my infancy they were praising me and telling me I could grow up to be whatever I wanted to be as they each tried to inspire me with a wish to fulfill their own respective dreams. You would think that sort of upbringing would make me feel like a failure for having missed both goals; but all it did was to make me grow up feeling very positive about myself. My own big dream has turned out to be to free the whole world from the fear of death. And thanks to those two sainted people, I never for a moment doubt that I am going to succeed at doing what I guess I already know is impossible.
So, each of us by young adulthood is essential an amalgam of all the cultural and personal information about who and what we are that has been bombarding us from birth. We may wind up feeling somewhat put together, and we may think we actually know and love ourselves; but in fact, for most of us what has been assembled into our present self-image is very different from who we might have seen ourselves to be if we had grown up with different cultural details and with a different set of parents. And then there are all the psychological pathologies that plague some folks, on top of (and perhaps because of) all these sources of bogus information! How can we even begin to discover and learn to love the eternal being that chose to be born in our physical body?
This problem has of late come to trouble me. I hear every day from strangers who have issues they hope I can help them address. I have neither the time nor the training to give them the kind of help that some of them need; and anyway, I am coming to realize that even the professionals they may have consulted don’t have the training that they would need to help these folks get at all the causes of their lifelong self-image problems. All the bogus information about ourselves that bombards us from birth is pure lies! Please read again the four points outlined above. It’s all lies. What is born in each sweet infant body is a powerful eternal being that is hopeful, bright, and already wise! All children arrive with a careful plan to achieve the maximum possible spiritual growth; but they arrive at young adulthood already battered by their ignorant parents and their degenerate culture. Each being is still, beneath it all, that very same eternal being! But sadly, each of them is now weighed down by a lot of confusing and mostly negative information.
This seems to be a problem as old as human civilization. Everyone is raised by amateurs! And when we grow up with an unpleasant understanding of who and what we actually are, it seems at first blush to be impossible for us to learn to truly love ourselves. Worst of all, a distorted and mostly negative view of ourselves that was built up in childhood from a variety of sources and is now familiar to us might become almost impossible for us to change! That was my first thought when, a week ago, I was dealing with my own emotional fallout from a very troubling counseling call. It was clear that traditional psychological theories and talk-counseling had been of no use to that sadly unstable soul. And with what I now understand about who we are eternally, it occurred to me that no mental-health therapy that is currently being tried is based in any real understanding of who each baby actually is and how it can go wrong. So it is no wonder that so many people now living are feeling so bruised and confounded by life!
And now I can see that Linda Creed and Whitney Houston have given us a potential way forward in their sweetly hopeful song. Two lovely women who died too young had wisdom far beyond their years! Like you, whenever I’ve thought of “The Greatest Love of All” I was hearing Whitney Houston’s voice, but the words seemed to be less important than the sounds. It was just another pop song to form a background for our daily lives. But please read those words! Whether they knew it or not, Linda and Whitney have given us what may be the most important piece of psychological advice of the whole twentieth century:
- It’s important that we rear children carefully, so as not to impair the precious spiritual beings that they already are.
- Inside each damaged adult is still that same precious eternal being who was once a newborn child.
Now that we at last understand what hampers so many human lives, what might we do to help each little child to achieve the best possible start, and how can we rescue more damaged adults? The more I think about it, the more confident I am that the best way for us to accomplish both goals will be to make the fact that we are all powerful, eternal beings and deeply beloved of a genuine Godhead the base and the core of our entire culture. That way, we can protect our children from all the worst clueless cultural lies, and we can help parents see their children not as high-grade pets, but as the sacred and joyous responsibility that they are. And we can take each damaged adult straight back to who he was at the beginning, once upon a time, and help him to expand and grow from there.
I can hear what you’re thinking. “Yeah, right. You’re a hammer, so to you everything looks like a nail.” Naturally, someone who was raised and inspired to try to achieve something really great, and who has seized on universal afterlife education, is going to see that mission as the cure for everything! But it’s more than that. I think this really will work, because we already have learned that coming to know the truth about death and about our eternal natures has a number of wonderful effects. Those who already know the truth are:
- Free from fear. Fear of death seems to be the base fear, so when we no longer fear death, we no longer fear anything.
- Thinking and living on a universal scale. The “life sucks, then you die” mentality that pervades most modern cultures is altogether gone once someone internalizes the fact that there really is no death.
- Loving naturally. Since love is the opposite of fear, once we stop fearing death and thereby we lose all our other fears as well, we begin to love everyone more and more, as a bubble rises in water toward the light.
This combination of changes in attitude has been altogether transforming for many of those who have taken the trouble to learn that for certain there actually is no death. The changes we have seen in our earliest students have made me eager to share the truth with all the world!
Silver Birch is a popular disembodied entity who was channeled by a skeptical atheist turned involuntary communicator named Maurice Barbanell (1902-1981). I generally don’t use anything channeled after 1930 as afterlife evidence because the risk that the living might fake these communications for personal gain is simply too great. But I know experts who are as skeptical as I am, and who nevertheless consider Silver Birch to be genuine. And he tells us that from his perspective, we incarnate in order to learn who we are. He said, “Your world is full of millions of people who do not know what they are there for, who they are, what it is that they must achieve whilst they are incarnate on earth. You can help them to realize that they are spirits with bodies, that the real individual is the deathless spirit, that the spirit is there to gain the experience to equip it for its larger life in our world. That is the most important thing that you can do.”
And indeed it is! Even though we cannot yet know the extent to which such knowledge will help people who were sadly damaged in childhood, and how it will help to rescue future children from also being damaged, it certainly will improve many lives worldwide! From birth on earth until graduation, each infinitely precious human being deserves to know the far-beyond-wonderful truth about who and what we really are!
I believe the children are our future.
Teach them well and let them lead the way!
Show them all the beauty they possess inside.
Give them a sense of pride, to make it easier.
Let the children’s laughter remind us how we used to be.
– Linda Creed (1948-1986), from “The Greatest Love of All” (1977)