When a Child Dies

Posted by Roberta Grimes • April 03, 2015 • 8 Comments
Afterlife Research, Death, Human Nature, Understanding Reality

Last week I was on Coast to Coast AMDawn & Faith with George Noory. Beginning while the show was still on air, I received a wonderful flood of emails, so many that it took me two days and nights to answer them all. Most were questions or comments, but a few were heartbreaking stories. One of these came from Dawn. Hers was one of the first emails I opened, and it was so full of pain that it brought tears to my eyes.

She said in part, “Faith died on December 15, 2014. She would have been 3 in February on the 25th. I don’t know how to find my way through this. Most days I hope someone will smash into me on the freeway and end it without it being my own fault. My baby, who could get in and out of the bath tub alone, drowned with no splash, no hitting her head, in the tub within moments of my sister getting her own toddler son out of the same bath in the master bedroom. How am I supposed to understand this, let alone go on?”

What could I say to comfort her? I talked about how we plan our lives, and “especially when you describe the way she died, I find it hard to believe that could have been anything but planned. Your gift to her will be to learn and grow spiritually. I know you find it impossible to believe this now, but when you are hugging the lovely young woman she will be when you see her again, you will understand. Dear friend, you live many lifetimes! You have reared children in other lifetimes, and you will do it again – this lifetime is just one hard day at the gym. And for this particular lifetime you are working at gaining spiritual gifts that perhaps you can’t achieve in any other way. The growth to come is her gift to you.” I had hours of answering emails ahead, and no time to say more. But I winced as I hit Send.

The next day Dawn sent me an astonishing email. The most important parts are in italics. “Thank you for taking so much time to write to me. I need to share something with you that I just found out about. My sister’s husbands family spent time with my Faith that I was not a part of as I worked. His younger sister, Angel, had a dream about Faith just last night. The same night I was reaching out to you and hurting so so bad. She texted the dream to my sister, who just told me about it… In the dream Faith appeared at a family party, and everyone knew she had passed but was so excited to see her. Faith was happy, giggling and excited by the attention and told them that she could not stay long and she had to go home. She went into a jumping house thing and Angel woke up crying.”

This was an astonishing communication dream! I emailed Dawn right away. “Dear friend, the dream and its timing were NOT coincidence, as of course you know! Your beautiful Faith has been desperate to get through to you the fact of her survival and her joy, but you have been too full of negative emotions – grief, anger – which are absolute barriers to the dead when they try to communicate with us. In desperation, she gave her message to someone close to you who would be able to get it to you. And she was at a FAMILY PARTY! Which, of course, is where she is right now! Faith was happy, giggling and excited by the attention, and she told them she could not stay long and she had to go home. WOW! There is her message to you, darling friend – that is what she wants you to know!

“Dear Dawn, the timing and the dream and the fact that you were listening to C2C and you reached out to me as you did and the fact that I answered your email right away were all Faith’s beautiful work. Her brief life here was the gift to you of a very advanced eternal being who loves you very much and will be waiting to hug you after you have used her gift to build an extraordinary life of spiritual growth. Not all gifts are pleasant to receive! Some are terrible, but beautiful all the same. Be comforted, dear Dawn, and allow Faith to help you heal and make the most of this brief lifetime!”

When I heard from Dawn again, she was calmer. “I had to read your emails a few times to really get the full sense of this message from Faith. At first I just took it in the context of the dream, but I am seeing now that it was really about her whole life here with me as well.”

Within a couple of days she was saying, “Thank you for sharing all of your insight with me. I don’t want to speak too soon, but for now, this interaction and Faith’s message has brought me to a place I didn’t think I would ever truly know again. I think I am getting that acceptance. I miss her so very much every day. I don’t want to jump the gun, but I think I am feeling better.”

And a day or two later she said, “Thank you for checking in on me… the pain seems to have eased in a good way. I ache for her and miss her badly, but somehow it is different than it was before that night.”

Ascended beings tell us that every child who dies is an advanced being who didn’t need a whole lifetime, but who went through the difficulties of entering a fetus and being born and living a brief life here as a spiritual gift to those who love and loseFaith that child. I know how you feel. I don’t like this either! But in the context of our eternal lives, the brief separation from a beloved child that can start us on a lifetime of spiritual growth is not the tragedy that it would be if this brief lifetime were all there was. Dawn isn’t past her grief. You never really get over the loss of a child. But knowledge is power! Knowing that every child who dies is happy, safe, and growing up in a beautiful reality surrounded by love helps most bereaved parents immeasurably.

Faith’s gift to her mother is also her gift to you.

Roberta Grimes
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8 thoughts on “When a Child Dies

  1. I can’t even imagine what this woman must have gone through but so glad she was able to gain a little more peace. Thank you for sharing this, Roberta.

  2. Roberta,
    Thanks again for your post. My heart goes out to Dawn. As we know, losing a child or children is one of the hardest lessons that a human being can face in Earth school. I can completely relate to Dawn’s feelings of wanting to give up and to be taken out of this existence. The pain is unbearable and we wonder how our physical bodies can continue to operate. But somehow, that same pain is what allows us to break open and surrender completely to the overpowering love and light of the Universal force. And to slowly come to the realization of the tremendous role that our children had and continue to have in our lives. I was someone who did not know or think about the afterlife before my sons were killed, so their signs and communications took a little time for me to accept as real. But I kept myself open (is there really any other choice?), and was given gifts beyond words. My thoughts and prayers will be with Dawn as she continues her own special journey.
    Love and blessings,

    1. Thank you so much, dear beautiful friend! I think you’re the most powerful and positive bereaved mother I have ever known – your wonderful Sean and Kyle must be so proud of you!

  3. When I was growing up in the 1960s, a family who lived one house away from mine welcomed and said farewell to six sons who passed before the age of 12. The family practiced Catholicism and their strong faith assisted in their process of grief, I’m sure. However, the story continues to stay with me, in my memory. The only thing that makes any sense is that this family’s lifetime scenario was “contract based.” I’m not sure of the nature of the contract–that will be revealed to those who need to know it when it becomes relevant. The loss of one child is difficult for sure–the loss of six is legendary. Yet due to my belief in the everlasting soul consciousness, I know that their story was all worth it on a level I don’t yet fully understand.

    1. Oh Mary, what an awful ordeal for those parents! Thank you for sharing their story with us. There are some things about what the dead tell us that I don’t really like at all, and one of them is that children like those little boys and like beautiful Faith, who is so much on my mind, always are very advanced beings who don’t need a whole lifetime of learning so their births and early deaths are carefully planned gifts to those they leave behind. I don’t like it at all! But at this point, I’m confident that it’s true. And what also is true is that these children have idyllic childhoods in an atmosphere of the most joyous possible love and understanding. Our greatest comfort in the face of every earth-tragedy is the certainty that every human life is eternal. Big hug, dear wonderful friend!

  4. Spiritual growth, awakening, resistance all triggered by birth and death are the most difficult task we have been given in this lifetime. Grief is a conduit and for some it takes them to their gifts. Loss of a child is the most tragic of events in a family’s life and yet somehow it’s the dreams and the messages that these sweet spirits dream to us that help us to crack just a little and just enough to allow healing to begin. Roberta your advice was so perfect for Dawn to begin her growth. She was fortunate that fate put her where she could hear you and take the initiative to share her pain as strongly as she did. Both she and her child are teaching us all and you are making that teaching available. Isn’t it incredible how all the puzzle pieces fit together. I am a mother and a grandmother and feel her pain to my core. I’m also the matriarch of our family having lost so many and so know grief just a little. Dawn will be come a strong leader for others. And she will have more children who will be loved all that much more because of her loss.

    1. Thank you so much, Sue – This is beautiful! Of all the counseling I ever do, this attempting to bring perspective to those who have lost young children is by far the hardest. But Dawn is such a bright and strong and glorious woman! I agree with you that she has much to share with others, and I have no doubt that she will do it beautifully. Thank you!

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