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Pets in the Afterlife

Posted by Roberta Grimes • February 25, 2015 • 292 Comments
Afterlife Research, Ask the Author, Death

Woman with Dogs and CatIf there is one question I am asked more frequently than any other it is whether ourcompanion animals are waiting for us in the afterlife levels. Some people lead with a personal challenge: “If my dogs can’t be there, I’m not going!” I understand how they feel. A heaven without our animal friends would not be a heaven at all, so I’m delighted to report to you that every animal we ever have loved awaits us in a beautiful eternal reality where love never ends.

There are many things about the afterlife that we can say are more than likely, based upon nearly two hundred years of abundant and consistent afterlife evidence. This is one thing, though, of which there is no doubt.

Animals are of a fundamentally different spiritual nature than human beings. I have seen messages from channeled entities saying that animals are of a “purer” nature, but I’m not even sure what that means; I know only that animals have spiritual identities, and those identities are unique to each kind of animal. When creatures die in the wild, or when domestic animals die without a close human bond, they return to what is sometimes called a “group soul” that is specific to their species. However, when any kind of non-human creature develops a love-bond with a person, that animal develops a separate identity. It enters our afterlife levels as a young and healthy version of itself, and there it awaits the joyous day when it can again lick our face or perch upon our finger or jump up, purring, into our arms.

You can immediately see a problem. People who enjoy their animal companions will love many cats or dogs or birds in their lifetimes, and the evidence suggests that all of them are going to be waiting for their human friends. There are early-twentieth-century communications where someone who has been in the Summerland for awhile complains about the mob of dogs and cats that greeted a new arrival, and nothing would do but that she first must pat every one of them before human loved ones could get near enough to hug her.

It isn’t only beloved dogs and cats and parakeets that await us, but farm and circus animals that have been loved by a human being likewise develop independent minds sufficient for them to be waiting in the Summerland. I have just had a wonderful reading with a psychic medium, my first in more than a decade, and my relatives and guides chose to assemble on my grandparents’ dairy farm. The medium kept remarking about how beautiful the farm was, and how abundant were the dairy cows, each one of which must in life have been a special pet of my grandfather’s.

Sometimes our animals will be among the deathbed visitors who help us transition. Reports of dogs at deathbeds are common. One early-twentieth-century hermit who had trusted no human being in life reportedly was met at his deathbed by a big white horse he must at some point have loved.

Boy with Horse

Our animals often give us post-death signs and communications. A familiar bark or meow, a rub against a leg, or a cold nose against an arm: these are frequent little signs. Animals that had slept on our beds will sometimes continue to do that, so we might be reading or watching TV and we will distinctly feel the animal jump up onto the bed and then see and feel the little paw-indentations as the animal walks to its sleeping place, where we will see and feel the greater indentation as the animal curls to sleep beside our feet. Full-blown visions of animals are rare, but they can happen, too.

My most extraordinary animal communication was a visitation dream from my horse. There was Beau in harness in front of me, pulling the cart in which he and I had enjoyed exploring the dirt roads near our home. He was trotting along happily, and I was in rapture. The only problem with driving a horse is the bugs in your teeth because you can’t stop grinning. Then we had, one after another, three encounters with diesel eighteen-wheelers that had no business on wilderness roads. Each time, as the truck bore down on us, I steered Beau into the roadside bushes and fast jumped out of the cart to hug his head against my chest so he wouldn’t bolt as the truck roared past us. As the third truck – perhaps his death – was approaching, I woke up.

That had been a communication dream, but what had it meant? In Child with Birdminutes, I knew. We had moved twice during his lifetime, and Beau was thanking me that he had been kept safe during both of the moves of his life and gently cared for until he died. After that dream, I have decided that I won’t ride or drive a horse again until my friend and I are reunited and I can have bugs in my teeth forevermore.

The fact that simply being loved by a person can give an animal an independent existence is one more indication of two things that the afterlife evidence consistently tells us. Our minds are integral parts of the eternal and infinitely creative Mind that brings forth the universe. And of every power that exists, by far the greatest power is love.

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Roberta Grimes

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292 thoughts on “Pets in the Afterlife

    1. Thank you for commenting, Marie! I’ve been hearing from other people today precisely that: coming back to us to sleep on our beds is an astonishingly common and loving gesture from our pets after they have died!

      1. The section about post-death signs and communications really got to me!! I have experienced some of these things with a couple of my cats and my pug Daisy!!!

      2. I lost my bunny of 4 years yesterday… He passed in my arms his name is shadow he was so loving and would follow me all around the house and lick me… So sad to have lost him. I just need some reasurrance that he knows I love him and that I hope he is waiting for me…

        1. I’m sorry about your loss, Luciano, but the evidence is overwhelmingly strong that every animal we ever have loved is waiting for us there, now perfectly healthy and loving us just as much as ever. So please be comforted. Shadow is fine!

          1. Roberta, may I ask about those poor animals who live a life of abuse or cruelty by sadistic owners? I would hope they are freed from that pain and somehow are in comfort? Many stories haunt me and break my heart for them

          2. Linda, the evidence suggests that animals that have not established a love-bond with people don’t wait for us in the afterlife levels. And why should an abused animal want to be there? I’m sure they’d want to get as far from us as they can! We are told by those that we used to think were dead that they join what is called a species-specific “group soul” – a united consciousness – and then apparently they go right on living. There are reports, for example, of great plains of bison and other hoofed animals, and I assume that pets who won’t want to to be with people will simply live on in their own special place.

    2. I have only ready about the rainbow bridge and not sure how real it was. We just lost our 15 year old pug. He was fine and kissed her once and passed.

      It’s been beyond hard. I find myself randomly crying. I googled after life and read this.

      After he passed we brought him in. They took him in the back and we heard his howl. We thought we were crazy. Apparently this actually happens. I hope to see him in the afterlife (crying)

      1. Yes, dear, you certainly did hear him howl! That is a typical kind of sign, and it’s lovely that your little one was able to do it so quickly after his death. You certainly can let yourselves be comforted by it! Your little guy is just fine, and 15 years is a good, long life for a dog. A friend of mine calls puppies “pain in a fur wrapper” because dogs have such brief lifetimes, but the glorious news is that they then go easily to the same place where we go, where they wait for us either with some of our loved ones, or – more usually – in group homes where they can play with other dogs. They are young and beautiful again, they neither eat nor need to be walked, and because time is different there it seems to them that very soon we join them and take them to their new homes there with us. It is YOUR LOVE that has given your little friend an eternal separate life! Animals that don’t have loving humans return to a species-specific “group soul,” but animals whose people love them (like your dog and my horse) are there waiting for us. I promise you that!

          1. Please remember that it is all about love. Whichever people the pet loved in live – whether same family, different families, or even not in the pet’s family at all – will be the ones that the pet will be eager to see again and welcome into the afterlife. In the case of an animal that had two families and loved and was loved by one or more people in each family, it is likely that the pet would go back and forth between homes as it felt the urge to be with one or another loved one. There is no distance in the afterlife, so even if the families were not neighbors it would be easy for the pet to move by thought from one home to another. It is love that gives the pet an independent existence, and love that will determine where and how it enjoys spending that existence!

          2. What if you die before your beloved pets do like my father passed away two years ago Coco and Toby are Chihuahua dogs are still alive and me and my mom take care of them was just wondering if we will all see them someday I’m sure my dad’s waiting to see them

          3. In a word: YES!! The best thing about where we all go at death is the wonderful and joyous reunion parties!!

  1. Great, reassuring article!!! I wanted to share w a friend who just lost her Scottie but couldn’t How can i share? Thanks

    1. Hi Allison! Don’t you love it when the news is all good? It’s on my Facebook page, but you might just direct her to robertagrimes.com and the Blog – that seems easiest. If she subscribes there, I’ll be delighted and new posts will come right to her inbox ;-).

      1. Do you have a book? This reassurance that I will see him again really helps my grieving process. I’m tough 🙂 but with dogs my heart melts

        1. Hello George! Don’t feel silly about your softness for dogs – I hear from people almost daily who have your same particular soft-spot! If you look for me on Amazon, you’ll see that I have several books. The Fun of Dying will help you to understand just where your four-legged loved ones are waiting for you, and The Fun of Staying in Touch is primarily about signs from and communication with people, but it includes some of the kinds of signs that dogs send to us. If you ever have questions, don’t hesitate to ask them through this website!

  2. Thank you for your blog on our beloved animal friends, Roberta. I have rescued many cats, dogs, and birds over the years and am looking forward to seeing everyone of them again. Some of my babies I have actually seen or heard shortly after they died, which was enormously consoling. And it has been common for me to dream of them once they have come through the initial transition to the other side. I am convinced my dog named Hawk, who recently died, sent me a delightful visitation of 5 little green lizards a week ago. I was sitting in an outdoor café in Hawaii and was really missing him. The five small lizards shyly crawled over to my place at the counter and hung around, looking at me, which was so funny and strange, until it occurred to me that it was a sign from Hawk. I had felt him so closely about a minute before the lizards showed up. Once I got the message, the lizards turned and left one by one quite quickly. It was such a great message of love. At the time Hawk died, I was looking after 5 dogs–perhaps there was one lizard for each dog?

    1. This is really beautiful, Ann! It’s astonishing how intense the love relationship is with our companion animals. And yes, the evidence is strong that every pet that you ever have loved will be waiting for you, excited and joyful, so be prepared for a great deal of leg-rubbing and face-licking!

  3. It was amazing, Roberta. As it dawned on me that the lizards were a greeting sent by Hawk, a song was playing in the cafe. Most of the words were unclear, but the words of the refrain were “I want to be with you 24/7. Your love is like my heaven.” And that was Hawk. When he was alive, if I went upstairs without him, he would be offended.
    The song and lizards were a wonderful experience. I suspect a friend of mine who died some years ago helped pull it together for Hawk. My friend has been so good at getting just the right song to play so that I know he is there and sending love.

  4. I grew up indifferent to animals. I married someone who loved animals. Our first dog suffered under my hands. Not until the end of his life I started to show affection for him. One day after he passed away, I was practicing OBE and I found myself in a strange place when a pack of dogs passed by me. One of the dogs stayed behind and coming towards me jumped and embraced me. I will probably never be able to express in words this encounter with my dog but he left with me the impression that he wanted me to know that he loved me and had forgiven me. This experience transformed me. Today, I have five dogs and have an immense love for all animals.

    1. Thank you for sharing this, Carlos! It is such a beautiful example of the way our companion animals work in our lives to open our hearts and help us to grow spiritually. What an extraordinary gift of love that first dog gave to you! I haven’t seen statistics, but I have come to believe that most actual post-death visitations from beloved animals are compassionate expressions of forgiveness. I also have had one such visitation. And the healing that comes from these experiences is, as you say, absolutely life-transforming!

  5. My beloved dog was euthanized yesterday after a rapid and unexpected decline in health. I found your blog to be comforting, especially since someone I know had commented that dogs don’t have souls. Thank you for taking the time to write such reassuring words.

    1. Oh my dear Cate, if there is one thing about which all afterlife researchers are absolutely certain it is that our pets are all waiting for us, young and healthy and exactly who they were in life, jumping up on us and barking and licking our faces with joy when we arrive. Depend upon it, dear – your dog is fine!!

  6. I lost my beautiful little JR Girl a few weeks back, she was a healing gentle little girl with a wonderful sense of fun, still very young her death was completely unexpected.
    I miss her way beyond words but I know she is with me, One morning she tried to wake me up by gently kicking my head something she use to do before she passed into spirit, it’s the fact that I can’t physically hug or touch her that makes it so very hard.

    1. I’m so sorry, Siobhan! I hope you’re relieved to know that your beloved is happy and healthy now and will be waiting for you where love never ends. And meanwhile, some people find that having a new little friend to cuddle does help. It’s terrible that dogs and cats have lives that are much shorter than ours, but every one of them who goes before us will be waiting for us and loving us! Just knowing that makes me smile whenever I think of it. Big hug, dear!

  7. Just 2 days ago our beloved yellow lab, Sidney, suffered a stroke and had to be euthanized. My wife and I are devastated. We loved him so much. Today would have been his 14th birthday. About an hour ago we were sitting on our backyard patio enjoying a quiet summer evening when out of nowhere a hummingbird showed up to feed on some flowers in a large flower pot about 5 feet away from us. Seeing a hummingbird is pretty rare, and when you do see one they’re usually gone in a matter of seconds. This one tonight stayed for nearly 4 minutes! Each minute or so it would move away from the flower pot, move closer to us, hover in mid-air looking at my wife and I for 5-10 seconds, then go back to the flower pot. It did this 3-4 times. It was surreal. After it finally flew away, my wife and I looked at each other in amazement saying, “O..M..G.., do you believe what just happened!” Neither of us has experienced anything like this before. I’ve got to believe it was some sort of sign or message from our baby, Sidney. 🙂

    1. I am so sorry for your loss, Mark. But you gave Sidney a wonderful life, and fourteen is a good old age for a lab – that is the problem with loving a dog, they have such a brief time with us. But you can be certain that Sidney will be waiting for you, young and healthy and happy and just the same lovely guy that he always was! And meanwhile, yes, that hummingbird is a wonderful sign from him that he has survived and he is just fine. Please be comforted in that!

  8. I lived in northern Alaska with a pack of wolves for many years in the 1970s to 1980s; all wolves go to wolf heaven. The most sacred thing wolves taught me is they never are bored, they constantly live in the present. All wolves learn, and it seems they learn what they need to learn, and lean it better than humans; they love life and only suffer when humans take their space and lives.
    The only way a human goes to wolf heaven, is by being a wolf and some, but very few humans, see how wonderful wolf life is, or have taken interest in what wolves experience, and very few care to make the transition to living purely for the excitement and pleasure of being alive. I hope I make it and live eternally in the ever fascinating, always living on the now.

    1. Hello Joe! This is fascinating. The evidence is strong that animals do indeed have species-specific group souls and heavens, but that you might visit where the wolves go would be quite an honor. Thank you for sharing!

    2. Thank you for sharing this beautiful story, I have always felt a deep connection to wolves and they have always seemed so evolved spiritually to me…

  9. This has truly helped me cope with the loss of my pet. We had no choice but to put my cat down Monday night.. it was hands down the most difficult thing I have been through. The pain is unexplainable. He was 15/16 years old, and was in the final stage of kidney failure. Knowing I will see him again one day puts my mind at ease. Ive had him since elementary school, he has literally been with me the majority of my life.. the last 2 nights I saw him in my dreams, he was happy and looked healthy again, I can only hope this is a sign from him.

    1. Oh Krista, what a beautiful story! Your cat is whole and healthy and young and happy again, and is eagerly awaiting your arrival; that we know for certain, based on the afterlife evidence. Those lovely dreams are likely to have been signs from him as well, and one tell is that he is showing himself to you as he looks now. If one or both of those dreams is still fresh and detailed for you even days later, then those were indeed communication dreams. I had a similiar dream from my horse, who had been important to my young life as your cat was to yours. And I still treasure it. Big hug, dear! He is fine, and he is delighted that you have recognized his communication!

  10. Good evening Roberta

    How reassuring to read your words and those of your readers, we have just lost our 15 year old yorkie Jake following a short illness. He was such a huge part of our family living between 3 homes, going on holidays with us, sharing our beds. I never knew such grief as his passing and cannot wait to pick up his ashes and have our little man back home. Its only been 3 days but after telling a picture of Jake that daddy was lost and struggling, tonight out of the blue someone I know had posted on facebook a message asking if anyone could dog sit on friday, upon contacting them it looks as though it may turn into a regular arrangement. They walk unbeknown to me the same routes myself and Jake walked….mysterious ways indeed and in someway I would like to think Jake helped me and the other dog.

    1. Oh my dear, what a wonderful story! For him to have put you together with your new friend would be well within what Jake could do, and perhaps he will also help you to open your heart enough to welcome another little friend into your home. Our animal companions have lives on earth so much shorter than ours, and they love us so much, that they are delighted when we will adopt and love others;then after we transition, we will have many furry friends there to welcome us, now all young and healthy! It can be a bit overwhelming to have them all back at once, but wonderfully so. Big hug, and thank you for sharing your story!

  11. Hi Roberta,
    We just lost our beloved dog, Quincy, to congestive heart failure. He was 14 years old. Quincy lived energetically and joyfully for nearly 5 months after the initial diagnosis with the help of medications, outstanding veterinary care, and love. Then in the wee hours of New Year’s Day, he declined rapidly. We could tell from his eyes that it was time. There was nothing more we could do. So with the help of one of our compassionate veterinarians, we said goodbye to our dear boy. The grief was overwhelming, as you know. Sometimes I wonder how any of us survive it. So I asked Quincy for a sign, a message, to let me know he was okay. Later that night, I turned on the radio, and moment later I heard these song lyrics: “I have an angel guiding me, and I’m on my way to heaven.” I can’t help but think Quincy was responding to my request. Hearing those lyrics certainly gave me comfort. Thanks for your kind and uplifting words to all of us who grieve right now.

    1. Dear Sara,that was an absolutely beautiful sign! He will probably send you others as well. The grief that we feel for our pets is no less than the grief that we feel for a human loved one, so it’s tragic that their lives are so brief! It feels as if we have lost a child. If I weren’t certain that our companion animals survive, I don’t think that I could bear the pain of living on! But they do survive; that is one of the facts about the afterlife of which we are most certain. Your darling Quincy is young and healthy now, he never will know pain again, and with all his old energy and joy he is playing with other pups in a place where only love exists. He won’t experience time there, so it will seem to him to be only moments before he hears your voice and licks your face again, even if forty years have passed between you. So please be comforted! And if you have questions, you always can contact me through this website.

  12. I was brought to this site I feel by my dog Lily, who passed 1/7/16. The story started 3/2014. We lost our sweet Lacey ( Beagle ) after having dog breast cancer for 3 years at the age of 11. My sister needed to take a 6 month old pup to the pound because she could not really give her time she needed. We had just lost Lacey one month ago, and were in no hurry to get another dog. Well I feel Lacey sent Lily to me a pitty/sheppard mix. Among all of the 50 plus dogs there she stood out. I met her for less than a minute. We left without her that day, because they started bringing my sisters dog in. ( who I later found someone wonderful to adopt her ) . Two days went by, and I just could not stop thinking about this sweet girl who stood on her hind legs and tucked her gremlin like ears back and kissed my hand. I felt an instant strong connection to her. Two days later the shelter had her at petsmart store. We went hubby was interested in a Lab. Well we glanced at Lily in the cage (then called Dora ) and left to go back to the shelter. Well there was this sweet husky so we decided to adopt her. Well she was going to a prison training program, and we would not get her for 12 weeks. So we decided to go back to petsmart one more time. The Lab my hubby wanted was being adopted by that family. So I talked him into taking the pitty for a walk. We walked around the corner, sat on a bench. She layed her sweet head on his lap, in less than five minutes we decided to take her home. In our 20 months with her she helped us get over Lacey’s death. Helped my husband, my senior dog and myself lose weight and improve quality in life because she needed to get out and burn some energy. Our 1st and senior baby got kennel cough from our trips to the park. Blessing in disguise. She had a growth on her head that took away her hearing. So she needed antibiotic. Well it ended up just being an infected cyst that almost went away, and her hearing returned. She taught our senior Nakita how to eat rawhide, and get into creeks, ect. Nakita also was diagnosed with dog breast cancer. Lily helped us get through her death 9/2015. Fast forward to 12/2015 she barley showed any signs of being sick. Her tummy was just a little swollen. We just thought she was tired hanging out lazy, because I was sick for the last 2 weeks of December. She was diagnosed with blood cancer, a large tumor in her heart, a huge tumor on her liver, pushing all her insides several inches down towards the rear, one and a 1/2 collapsed lungs, and dried blood in her lungs when they tried to pull fluid to help her breathe. We loved her enough to put her to rest. Well today our radio came on by itself, next to the fire that she loved. I feel it was a sign from her, but I feel like I should feel her presence, and I am not sure that I do.

    1. Dear Dawn, that certainly sounds like a sign from Lily! Whenever anything happens that might conceivably be a sign, you should always say aloud, “Thank you! Please do it again!” And don’t think in terms of your loved ones and beloved pets needing to do any particular things for you, but simply be alert to anything that they might do. We are all sensitive in different ways, so some people will indeed feel a presence but some people never will. And it’s all fine! All your beloved companion animals will be waiting for you, dear, now young and healthy and with precisely the same personalities that you’ve loved so much!

        1. Dear, all the afterlife news is so good that there are many questions I am delighted to answer. And questions about our pets have the happiest answers of all!

          1. I’m so comforted by the knowledge of knowing that I will see my beloved two Dachshund puppies that passed away while I was living in a different state taking care of my mom as her caregiver one was run over by a vehicle Terrence and Philip which is Terrence is brother passed away of old age Philip was my dog though I have been grieving for over 20 years over my two dachshund pets and your words have greatly relieved my grief knowing that they will be waiting for me thank you Roberta it’s taken 20 years to have that question answered I’ve always blamed myself felt guilty for the death of Terrance cuz he got out of the backyard through a hole that was actually repaired but he found a way out my son was the one that found him along side of the street not far from our house

          2. Tracy, the worst problem most pet parents have with the death of their dogs or cats is what is plaguing you now: guilt. You really have to forgive yourself! Your dogs have. They only forgive – they never blame us! So please forgive and feel good about yourself, that you were such a wonderful and loving companion to them, and know for certain that they will be waiting for you. Wonderfully, they always do!!

  13. Hi Roberta, I recently lost my horse Happy a week ago. He was 30, 32 year’s old, and happy till the morning he died. He was healthy at the time, but 3 week’s before started losing his appetite, and decrease in water intake gradually. When I showed up that morning he was waiting for me, but he couldn’t walk to me. I got his blanket off, and he was soaking with sweat, and laboring to breathe. I got the vet out right away, and he treated him with everything posible , but couldn’t do anything to keep him up as his balance was also failing. He fell down, and was starting to die as I held his head, petting him, and talking to him he relaxed a little. The vet recommended putting him down as he wasn’t going to make it. I stayed with him till he got sedated, and dozed off. I left before he got the final injection, as he was going to sleep. I went to my car, as I was in shock with this unexpected sudden death. Within minutes of his passing I felt a warm, and calming feeling in my stomachs. I do feel that was his energy around me. I haven’t been to the ranch since his passing, and hope his spirit is not stuck there not knowing what to do. Also, my other old horse is there still. He was in the corral next to him. 2 nights later after his death I dreamnt about him, and he seemed healthy. I was shocked in my dream that he was there since he had died, but maybe he was letting me know he is still around, and OK. I truly hope I see him again as he was the kindest horse I have ever met. He loved all animal’s, and kind to people too. A gentle soul.

    1. Oh my dear, I lost my beloved Beau in much the same way! He was a few months shy of 30 years old, and I had owned him and loved him since he was six months old. He just couldn’t get up one morning. It’s a kindness when we call the vet to ease their end.

      I am sure that Happy is fine! That dream was almost certainly a communication dream; I had one of Beau as well, a few days after his death. Beau is such a wise, strong, gentle and beautiful being that now, surprisingly, he has joined my spiritual guidance team. My primary guide has told me that during one of our meetings I asked to ride out of here on Beau, and he says “that has already been arranged.” So I will know when again I see my beautiful friend that will mean that at last I am going home!

  14. Thank you Roberta.
    You were very lucky to have had your Beau for almost 30 years. I wish I had Happy for that long, but met him at 15, and spent 16 years with him. I went to the ranch last night, and visited our other old horse Smiley. He seemed to be mimicking happy in some ways, so I’m assuming they are together. Also,Smiley spends a lot of time in the corner where Happy was put down. I’m thinking of moving him to another ranch where he has a pasture, or larger corral, and make a new start as I felt sad, and he seemed sad too.
    Thinking back a few years ago when I lost my cat I also had a dream 2nights later that she was with my other deceased cat. I didn’t recognize it at first because my other cat looked so much younger,but woke up saying that was Betty. Thank you again for everything!

    1. You’re welcome, dear! It’s wonderful that the news about our beloved animals is all so good, since I would find it heartbreaking to have to tell people otherwise. But the news is wonderful! Please let me know if you have further questions, and meanwhile please kiss Smiley on the nose for me ;-).

  15. OK. I will, but one kiss only, as Happy was very possessive of his mom. Smiley, and Happy always fought for my attention, but Happy had my heart always.

  16. Hi Roberta,
    I have a question for you. I went out to see Smiley today at the ranch. He came running over to me, pawed at the spot where happy passed, and then rolled by it. I wonder if he’s trying to tell me happy is there. He also never whinned for happy after he was taken away. Which also is odd. I’m thinking happy is staying there with smiley, and I shouldn’t move him to another ranch. What do you think? Oh, I gave him a kiss for you too!

    1. Hello dear Sheila! I do love seeing how much more cheerful and hopeful you are feeling. Knowing that Happy is now as happy as his name really does make a difference, doesn’t it? Difficult to know Why Smiley is acting as he does, but it is possible that Happy is visiting him. Animals tend to be more sensitive than we are: they often can see those who are not in body. To be frank, I don’t think that I would move Smiley just now; I think I would let him process the loss of his friend in familiar surroundings. Especially as he is an older horse, allowing him to feel safe in familiar surroundings would be a gift to him. Big hug, dear!

  17. Thank you Roberta for responding . I agree with you on leaving him be for now, maybe for good there at that ranch. Smiley, and I both loved Happy so much that his loss is so unbearable. I would like to share with you how I ended up with happy in my life. 16 years ago I lost a horse from colic that I just bought 2 weeks later she died from stones. I was heartbroken, and somehow was led to happy as he was on a rental string there where my horse died. I rode happy, and we connected instantly. The stable didn’t want to sell him to me because he was their best horse, but really depressed. The owner finally sold happy to me, and told me he saved her life in a accident she had on the ranch a few years back. So, he deserved to be with me, and have a good life. 3 years ago I almost died in the hospital from a flu virus that was attacking my brain, and almost in a coma. I remember knowing I was dying, but starting fighting thinking what would happy do without me. I woke up with the nurse crying, and saying we almost lost you twice on the table. I saved Happy’s life, and he saved mine. I thought you would like this story, as it such a powerful bond between a horse, and human. Maybe very much like you, and your beloved horse beau.

    1. Dear Sheila, I think that few people who haven’t had a long relationship with a horse can appreciate how deep the love becomes and what wonderful people the best horses really are. Beau was a wise and complex gentleman, very careful with children, very understanding, but quick to buck off anyone that he didn’t like: he was one who would not suffer fools. And he still is all of that! I am told that he has joined my spirit guidance team, which fact I find kind of boggling since I didn’t know that was even possible for horses. I am also told that I have asked to ride out on him, and my doing that has already been arranged….

  18. Hi Roberta,
    My horse Happy to was very selective on people , and other horse’s coming near him, or me. I had times where he would block me from other people he didn’t feel good about by standing in front of the two of us, and not moving. He always could read people, and I could read his thoughts that were a warning. I hope to that he has a special job like beau on the other side. Not sure what the guidance team is, but sounds like he’s working with your spirit guides, angels? I’m sure you will ride out on him too!

  19. This was a great read and a comfort for me today as we lost our beautiful sweet Himalayan cat Sasha today and we are all heartbroken. The intensity and depth of our grief is as strong as for any family member human or otherwise.Thanks for this. Peace and Light to you!

    1. Oh Bob, I’m so sorry about your loss, but I’m thrilled to be able to assure you that it is absolutely temporary! And we don’t want our beloved companions to live on here in pain and distress; it really is so much better for them to go to where they can be young, healthy, and happy forevermore. Then when eventually you get there, too, and are sitting and enjoying one of the beautiful reception gardens, Sasha will come and jump right into your lap!

  20. Roberta i just lost my dog Angel i found her 6 years ago abused and walking the streets of Detroit coverd in mange and cuts we think she was used for a bait dog for dog fighting. Well anyway we were going to find her a home but we were unsuccessful so i decided to keep her. She ended up being the most sweet kind hearted dog i ever seen i loved her she loved me she always waited for me in the window and i would give her a kiss on the forhead when i left for work every day. Well sunday she seemed sick like she had a cold i took her to the vet they said she had a infection and it was not a big deal. The next day i gave her a kiss on the forhead coverd her up her tail was wagging becuse she was happy. Rite when i was leaving work to come home i got a call from my girlfriend frantically asking where i was she was like Angel is dieing i was about 20 min from home i herd her die on the phone on my way home. We found her 6 years to the day that she died. Im so upset and sad i can barely work or anything. I think its so crazy she got sick 1 day then died the next. I read all the posts and it gives me hope that shes ok and in a better place but i feel broken. I keep hopeing i have a dream about her but i have not yet. I thank you and everyone for there storys on this page it dose help but i am still so sad. I just hope every second i will see her again. Thank you for the good info and everything you do. ..Jason

    1. Oh dear Jason, I have been doing afterlife research for half a century, and of all the things that afterlife researchers know, the most certain is that the animals we love will be waiting there for us, now whole and healthy but otherwise exactly the same as they were before! It is likely that you aren’t perceiving signs from Angel because your own grief is blocking them, so it’s essential that you do everything you can to convince yourself that she is fine. If you would like PDFs of The Fun of Dying and The Fun of Staying in Touch, I will be glad to send them if you will send me a contact email through this website.

      Angel may have been older than you thought she was when you found her. It’s likely that if she had lived longer, her course in old age would have been painful for her and the end would have been no different, so I hope you can see that your letting her go just briefly is a gift to her. It feels tragic, doesn’t it, that dogs have such brief lives here? But they will live on with us eternally, dear. Please know that fact, and all will be well!

  21. very uplifting site..
    one week ago today my best friend Max an 8 year old Mini Schnauzer died suddenly. he was very healthy im still in shock over this.. he was playful eating and was normal, we went to my room as he sleeps with me every night I started to pet him and he took 2 deep breaths and went limp all within prob 10 seconds. I really am distraught and begging for signs that he is ok and knows how much I love him.. and that he will be with me when its my turm to go.
    he is the reason I wanted to go home at nights. and I am now concerned of the 12 yr old shitzu I have that losing his brother is going to kill him also he has bad back legs to begin with. if my Max was going to try and communicate with me would he have done it by now?
    I am so sad wondering if I did or didn’t do something I should have, feeling guilty but I know he had a great life it was just to early for him to pass

    1. Oh my dear, I’m so sorry that you have temporarily lost your friend, but please know that this doesn’t mean that you did something wrong! I’m sure it was a health issue of some kind. Our domestic dogs are so highly bred now that they carry various kinds of heart and other health problems, and there was surely nothing you could have done in this case to change the outcome. So please don’t blame yourself!

      Many of our beloved pets do give us signs of our survival, but for you to be deep in grief can actually make that more difficult for Max. Please try to comfort yourself, be certain that he will be waiting for you, and open your heart so he can get through to you; and if you can do that well, then it is likely that he will send you some sort of sign. Above all, dear, don’t feel guilty! Max is young and happy now and waiting for you, and since he isn’t going to experience time as you will, it will seem to be just a moment or two before you join him there, after a good, long life here. There really is nothing but good news!

  22. I put my dog Brandi, a Shih Tzu, to sleep last October. She was 15 and 5 months old. She had eye ulcerations and a heart murmur. I had to have one of her eyes removed about 10 months before she died. I was grooming her and accidentally scratched her Cornea. I took her to the vet right away and he said it healed. Two days later the cornea ulcer destroyed her entire eye. The vet told me it was gone. I gave her all the help I could going to vets and taking care of her eye. Then the other eye ulcerated. I medicated her until she died with eye gel everyday. Almost two years. I put her down after she had a small seizure at the vet. We were about to go home and right in front of the examining room door she had the seizure. The vet felt it might be a brain tumor. I feel guilty till this day. I can’t stand to walk where we walked together. Memories of her with me put me in tears. I can’t stand to go to the park. My home is empty without her. I had one dream of her jumping on the couch. But reading other stories I never got a sign that would comfort me. I was upset at times, very stressed but she knew she was my Baby. Right before I put her down maybe a week I said crying “Brandi how am I going to live without you?” She was not responding to me in her usual way. I thought she had dementia. When I went out she wandered aimlessly never sitting down till I got home. So I never left her alone for long. I have a Yorkie who was her sister. Now the Yorkie is very sick. She is also depressed losing Brandi. Maybe Brandi is upset with me and doesn’t want to contact me. I never loved anyone like I loved her. She has to know. I sometimes sit and cry over her being gone – it is like she took my heart with her. I never got one sign or felt her near me since she died. I hope she knew everything I did was out of love for her. Sometimes I got upset with her but mostly love and hugs. All o know if there is a doggie heaven I hope she knows how much I love her and putting her down was for her to not suffer with a brain tumor or seizures snd me not being able to watch her suffer. Now I am worried about my sick Yorkie who is very ill. Maybe losing Brandi sped up her disease of an enlarged heart and possibly cancer. They can’t even biopsy her because of heart I guess so I take it day by day with her and I can’t believe both my dogs won’t be with me.

    1. I’m so sorry for your pain! Please know that your little Brandi is certainly well and happy and she loves you! In all my decades of doing this research, I have never encountered a single situation in which a dog who had transitioned did not absolutely adore its human friends left behind, and of course many (most?) of these dogs also had been given the gift of vet-assisted release by those who loved them. They simply don’t think as we do, dear; they blame us for nothing, but they only absolutely and completely love us! Your dream was probably a sign from Brandi – especially if the dream is still pretty vivid – and the likely reason for your not having received clear and recognizable signs is your level of grief. Sadly, deep grief can act as an absolute barrier to communication, so I urge you strongly to get yourself out of this funk. You don’t deserve to do this to yourself! Please help your little Yorkie to transition as well so she won’t suffer, either, and then ask them if one or both of them will please reincarnate for you (this often happens). See if you feel guided to a breeder. You can love again, dear, and whether or not one of your beloved dogs has reincarnated for you, they will be thrilled to have you again enjoying a little furry companion!

  23. Hi Roberta, I had to put my very best friend Dixie down last night. An absolutely beautiful 45 lb Ridgeback mix. Her beauty on the inside matched her beauty on the inside. She just turned 13 and the vet told me she was well and would have no problems going to 15+. Well she started losing her appetite and weight rather quickly the last few weeks and even had to go through a terrible vestibular infection about two months ago that they had thought was brain cancer. After helping her back to health, he ruled out brain cancer. Thought she was in the clear. Only to show after an ultrasound yesterday cancer in her stomach and kidney. I could tell she was to far gone in her eyes and body. I would not allow her to suffer, she was to good of a dog to deserve that. So I had to do the most difficult thing in my life and say goodbye. She was a rescue dog at a Petsmart in Georgia and was only a 1/2 hour away from being put down. Second Chance Adoption saved her and I will be forever grateful. I got 11 wonderful years with this beautiful creature. She will be missed immensely. I talked to an Animal Communicator and she said that animals could come back in different forms or animals. What is your thought on that? I am looking so forward to seeing my best friend again. I sure hope that it happens! I love you forever Dixie!

    1. Hello Scott! I’m sorry about your temporary separation from Dixie, but fortunately the news is all good: we have abundant evidence that every animal we ever have loved is waiting for us in the afterlife levels, now young and healthy. And since time operates very differently there, it won’t even seem to her that much time will pass before you join her there, even if it’s a half-century of earth-time! Yes, occasionally the reincarnation of dogs has been reported fairly convincingly, but there is no need to hope for that when you know for certain that she will be waiting for you and you WILL be with her again, forevermore. Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug!

  24. Thanks for the quick reply. Do you think that Dixie is a dog again or is it possible another animal? I am so looking forward to being with her again, the time went by so fast!

    1. Dear Scott, I have seen no evidence that animals change species at all, and never mind this quickly! She is a dog, now again young and beautiful. And she will be licking your face again before you know it ;-).

  25. Reading this helping me. My 14 year old bunny, Jimmy Jam, is still with me but I have found myself getting sad about the end. I know he won’t live forever and he has already overcome tumors, cancers, infection and other health issues. He is so strong and my best friend. He is my first pet on my own and has seen me through everything. I don’t want to be away from him and I want to know that I will be with him again. My science mind and spiritual heart fight for attention but hearing someone assure me that death is not the end strengthens my faith.

    1. Dear Alisa, please know that your beloved bunny will be waiting for you, now healthy and happy and young! As so many have said, it wouldn’t be a heaven if it didn’t include our beloved companion animals, and indeed it does include ALL of them! They naturally have much shorter earth-lives than hours, but you can feel comfortable in letting him go, dear. He will be loved and cared for until you can pick him up and hold him again ;-).

  26. Thank you for your kind words. The hard part is the not being able to see them and touch them during that waiting period. I’m soaking up whatever time I have left so I can hopefully hold on to that feeling until we meet again.

    1. It’s good to give an older beloved companion animal a lot of affection for many reasons, not least of which is the fact that we want their bonding on us to be very tight when they leave their bodies. Then, simply keep him in your heart! You may find that if you are open to it, he will soon give you little signs of his survival. If anything that happens ever seems to be from him, be sure to thank him and ask him for more! I’m sending you a hug, dear.

  27. Thank you for sharing this. I cried so hard when I lost my Gabe–she was an older cat, but it came without warning–she’d always behaved much younger than her years, then one day things went bad, I took her to the doctor and they said it was her time…

    But reading your words have made me cry happy tears. I so hope it’s true. Do our pets get to spend time with our loved ones who’ve already crossed? Before we “get there?”

    1. Hello Jon! Yes, indeed it’s true that our beloved animals are all there, now young and healthy, and from their point of view it will be only moments before we arrive to hug and love them again. Their situation upon arrival is pretty much like that of our children: if we have transitioned loved ones they were close to in life, they may live with those loved ones while they wait for us; but since for most there aren’t those loving connections, they live with others of their kind in group homes, cared for and loved by gentle souls who have been specially chosen for these roles. That seems to be what makes our animal friends happiest. But, no worries, Jon! Gabe is perfectly fine, healthy and happy, and still the exact same cat that she was before. The evidence for this happy fact is entirely consistent and overwhelming!

  28. Just reading these letters re in forces my belief, which I always had that I will see my babies that have gone from here to the Rainbow Bridge….I truly believe that, recently lost one cat in June, she was my Baby Girl, lost her to having her anesthetized for an xray of throat and one in July due to Cancer.I still hurt and cry. Lost more thru the years. there never here long enough. Want to order your book and maybe find answers to a lot of questions.

    1. Oh Cindy, please know that your little friends are fine! And they’re all healthy and happy and young again, which to me is the most wonderful part: our animals babies are eternally young and beautiful! You will be able to pet and play with all of them again, and you’ll have them with you forevermore if that is your wish. Claim and own that fact! And meanwhile, I’m sending you a big hug ;-).

  29. Hi Roberta, I lost my 10 year old cat 2 weeks ago very suddenly and unexpectedly, I’m broken-hearted. I have been left with guilt and regrets with her going so quickly, no time to say goodbye or tell her how much I love her. I hand reared her as her 4 siblings died not long after birth and her mother didn’t want to know, my dog at the time mothered her and I lost him when Kit was 6 months old, I’d like to think she’s with him now. We were very close and she followed me all round the house, now everywhere I look there’s memories of where she slept, where she sat, where she died, I didn’t realise how much I took having her with me for granted, and it’s killing me, it’s so bad I can’t stay in this house anymore, I need to move. I have another cat who is now grieving for her and that is also breaking my heart seeing her looking round for Kit and looking so lonely and lost. The day she died I sat up all night in shock and at 4.30 am I sat outside just staring into space, then all of a sudden I saw a bird fly close by to me, it turned out to be a robin and I just pray that was a sign to say she’s ok. Sorry if this is long, but it’s just all going round my head continuously and I think I’m going mad. X

    1. Oh my dear Tracey, please be at peace! Your cat knew – and knows – that you love her, and there was no need for you to ever tell her goodbye because between the two of you there never will be a goodbye. Truly! Every companion animal we ever have loved is waiting for us, now young and healthy, usually in a group home with other animals to play with; and if your dog and cat were close, then they are likely together. Grief is tough, I know! But please know at least that you have nothing to feel guilty about, no reason whatsoever for regrets, and the prospect of the most joyous possible reunion. It is guaranteed. Meanwhile, you might think about getting a rescue kitty to act as a companion for your surviving cat, and also to give you the chance to love again. Kit won’t mind at all; in fact, there are documented cases where a deceased pet came back as the new pet. Truly, completely, all is well! Meanwhile, please consider yourself hugged ;-).

  30. Thank you so much Roberta, it’s very much appreciated, I know in the midst of grieving there are no words that can make it all better, but your words give me some comfort in knowing that my Kit knows I love her and I know your right when you say there was no need for goodbyes as we will be together again. Kit was very close to my dog and looked at him as her mother and I remember when he died she spent hours looking for him and crying, so I know now they will be together again. It hurts me that I can’t just pick her up and cuddle her, and I keep thinking back to the times when I had all those chances to do that and I never did as I would be busy doing house work etc, but I suppose in time I will remember the cuddles that we did have and the fact she went through thick and thin with me for 10 years, she knew when I was upset as she would come and sit with me more. I have 2 dogs aswell, so not sure about another kitten, but wouldn’t say never. Would you say the robin was a sign to say she’s ok, thank you for the hug, it’s much needed. X

  31. Hi Roberta,
    I had my dog Abbey put to Sleep on the 1st of July 2016, she would of been 12 this December, i had her since she was 11 weeks old, She was a big dog cross Rottie and German Shepherd but look like a Labrador but wasn’t. The morning we had her put to sleep she had, had some sort of Seizure fit in the chair that morning at 7am, her legs were not good and we felt she had been ill for a while, and the vet thought it was right to put her to sleep without putting her through any more stress with test and things, and felt it was the right thing to do. I have felt a bit guilty and thought should i have brought her home, and feel somehow we made the right decision. I have another dog Rolo who missed her dearly. I have got Abbey’s ashes as i felt this is what i wanted a way of keeping her in the family. Please can you tell me if i did the right thing. Thank you Juliet x

    1. Dear Juliet, you did exactly the right thing! Abbey was clearly ready to transition, and you did the most loving thing for her that you could possibly have done. Bless you for that! No need to hold onto her ashes, since she isn’t any part of those ashes now; instead, she is young and healthy again and running and playing with other dogs who also are waiting for their people to arrive. Time is very different there, and even if you don’t get there for very many decades it is going to seem to her like just a little while before she is joyously with you again!

  32. Hi Roberta,
    Found your blog after losing my cat in July and being so devastated at a very unexpected loss, looking for hope. Thank you for this blog and putting this info into the universe 🙂
    Since losing my sweet Tiger Bones, I believe I’ve seen him, and my husband as well, on different occasions, a week apart from each other. When it happened I immediately thought of this very blog and your mention of animals belonging to a soul source and once they form an attachment to a human, do they then receive an identity. My question to you is, is it possible for animals to roam here who don’t have an identity yet, to be used as a vessel more or less, for our departed animals to inhabit briefly, to show themselves to us?
    I hope that doesn’t sound too nuts ahahah but this is what I believe has been the case for the two situations in which I believe my husband and I each saw Tiger. Like he’s swinging by to let us know he’s around and OK….is this something common, you’ve seen?
    Thanks Roberta!
    Love and light to you 🙂

    1. Hello Jill! This is a good question – thank you for asking it. I don’t confirm anything unless there is considerable consistent evidence for it, so I can’t say for certain that our animals are able to take over the bodies of living animals; but there are some tantalizing bits of evidence that indeed something like that does happen. Certainly, people are able to influence the minds of lower-level creatures like insects, birds, and the like. They always request and receive permission from the creature first. And since animals share a species-specific “group soul” – that’s the term that is used – they are likely very much in tune with others of that same species. So it would not be at all surprising to learn of instances where a companion animal requested and received permission to make use of a living same-species animal as a way to communicate with a beloved person. Fascinating, and in my view entirely possible!

  33. Rascal, my 18 year old cat slipped out the front door without anyone seeing him. We searched for 10 hours trying to find him and bring Him home. I left the outside lights on for him that night so he could find his way back to us. I checked the porches every hour throughout the night. I finally fell asleep and had a very quick but vivid picture of Rascal and then a vivid red heart. It woke me out of my sleep. I wasn’t sure if it was a sign from Rascal or a sign that he’d be home. We did get a tip the next day that they saw Rascal the previous afternoon. We all spread out and searched the woods. My husband found our sweet boy laying in a clearing. He had passed. My heart is broken. I can’t stop crying because of the loss. Do you think that was a sign from Rascal or just a dream?

    1. Hello Sheila! If the dream remains vivid in your mind beyond 12 hours or so, then it is almost certainly a communication. Your little friend is fine! It is not uncommon for all of us – people and animals – to want to be alone as we transition, and so it seems to have been for him. Please be comforted to know that he is beyond pain, young and healthy again, and waiting for you in the care of loving people. If you can get your grief tamped down enough, you may well get further signs from him. Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug!

  34. Hi Roberta, my 13 year old cat Jada, was diagnosed with nasal cancer and I’m going to put her down this week because she is not doing too well. She has been such a loving and faithfull companion and it breaks my heart, but I feel I need to set her free from her suffering. Thank you for your blog and all your responses, it is helping me get through this time. I am a member of an ancient mystical order (the rosicrucians) who teach exactly what you have said, animals have soul groups they return to but those touched by human love, affection, and care, develop a distinct individual personality (thank you for your reassurance and sharing of knowledge on this point). I hope time for Jada after she passes will seem like a short time before she is reunited with me since I am 37 and hope to live a long life. blessings to you for your compassion and sharing of wisdom with other.

    1. Oh David, I’m so glad to be able to help you! It’s wonderful that the news is so good, isn’t it? Every one of our beautiful, beloved companion animals is young and healthy and happily thriving there as they wait for us! Just hug Jada tight and let her slip out of that damaged body, knowing that as she leaves she truly is being set free.

  35. Hi Roberta, This morning/ hours ago as I live in Europe/ I accidentally came over your blog and started reading and I must say you are a true blessing, a gift from god. I am not really religious, but I do believe in afterlife, I believe in some Power/Oneness. Please excuse my English, we speak different language here.
    I truly admire your intelligence, empathy, compassion, knowledge, your
    refined manners with a sense of duty to follow your calling, to make it easier for us to understand. My days on this planet are numbered, I have no fear, all I wish is to be with my dogs again. I long to see my wonderful mother, my beloved grandparents, my friends, but yet if I had to choose between them and my dogs I would choose my dogs! And I can’t even say how bad this makes my feel.

    1. I’m so glad that you have found us, Lelja! And your English is wonderful; I would have thought you a native-speaker.

      The very good news is that you won’t have to choose between your human loved ones and your canine loved ones! All are healthy and young now and waiting for you, and they’re planning the biggest party of your life. You’ll get to live with any of them you like, and you can spend time with any of them you like, and no one will resent it if you choose different companions or if you want to change companions. The place where you are going is love and joy and peace, dear Lelja. Be happy that you are about to go home! The hard part of life is over now, and the wonderful part begins.

      I’m sending you a big trans-Atlantic hug!

  36. Hello Roberta,
    Today I had to do the hardest thing ever….I put down my 14 year old Cocker Spaniel who’s name is Kipper. He was having some complications with a mass that was spreading into his chest and I took him to the vet and we spoke about amputating the left arm so that he can live another two years or so but when they read the x-rays, they found cancer of the lungs. Today I believe he had a stroke because he lost much of his coordination. I rushed him to the vet and we decided to give him his peace and put him down. I have read all the posts and comments about an afterlife but on other sites I am reading that the bible does not have evidence of an afterlife for animals because they have souls but not spirits and also because they were not created in the image of God. I want to know that Kipper is ok and that I will someday see him again. How are you so certain that this will happen for all of us. Please help to have a piece of mind. Thank you.

    1. Dear Debbie, one of the things of which afterlife researchers are most certain is that all animals that have been loved by a human being develop eternal individual lives and are waiting for us, now young and healthy and happy. Animals are indeed of a different class than people, and they have what are called species-specific “group souls” to which they return at death. It is human love that gives to those animals we love an individual existence. I know this seems too good to be true, but a lot of what we have learned about the afterlife seems too good to be true! And the evidence is abundant and overwhelming that EVERY beloved animal survives death as an individual. This is not a theory. This is a certainty!

      Please ignore the Bible. The only part of it that we can validate as coming from God is the Gospels – four books! – and since the Council of Nicaea in 325 edited and added things to the Gospels we can’t even validate every word of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. The rest of the Bible was written by fallible human beings who meant well, but they simply didn’t know what we now know. The souls/spirits dichotomy is nonsense! And the “image of God” stuff is a human distinction, not a distinction that God makes. For God, the only thing that matters is LOVE. And no loving God would allow you to love Kipper so much and then take him away from you. In your heart I think you already know this. God is pure and infinite love, and you in particular are God’s best-beloved child, so please be content in the certainty that your love for Kipper has given him an independent existence. Go on to make the most of this life – if you’ll send me a contact through this website I’ll send you a PDF of The Fun of Growing Forever to help you do that – and hold Kipper tight in your heart with the certainty that you will be reunited with him in a place where the two of you can be forever young!

      1. First, I would like to say that your words for me and many other animal lovers are so much needed and very much appreciate. Everything you said is exactly how I feel in my heart regarding the love that God allowed me to give to Kipper in the 14 years that I had him. I just can not bring myself to believe that an animal would not be allowed into heaven. All they know is LOVE and God is LOVE as you stated. All my concern was is to know that my guy is in a better place and that he is not missing me. We lived together alone for many years and when I would come home from work or from anywhere for that matter he would behave as though he hadn’t seen me in years. Now that I am not with him, that is my concern that he is suffering not having me around. I guess what I am saying is that my heart will become content when I know that he is happy and healthy again and that he is not missing me. Thank you so much for your quick response and I would love to read your book. You can send the pdf to DebCorrea73@icloud.com.

        God bless you Robert Grimes!

        best regards,
        DebCorrea

        1. Time essentially does not exist beyond this level of reality, and he is in a group home with loving caretakers and other dogs to play with. So it’s going to seem like no time at all passes before you arrive to pick him up, and meanwhile he is having lots of fun!

  37. My spaniel mix, Jilly, passed away last Wednesday November 2. It left me so devastated. I was not ready, even though I know she was not altogether healthy. She was at the groomers, had been suffering from worsening heart failure, but seemed to be fairly stable. She was put in a kennel to rest for a few minutes, went to sleep and didn’t wake up. She was a brave, adorable girl whose tail never stopped wagging. I was so devoted to her, as she was to me. I went out of town on the next day after to visit my daughter, and returned on Saturday. Her brother, Jack, and I went out for a walk that afternoon, and that’s when I started finding feathers. The first one was right in front of the place she would always pause to tinkle, then I kept finding others: small white, then black, white and gray feathers, all along our usual path. I can’t tell you the feeling I had when I found the first one. I have never really been one to look for and believe in signs from beyond, but I believe this was Jilly communicating with me. It has really helped me cope. What do you think?

    1. Wow, Kathy, that’s beautiful! It’s unusual for animals to give us object-signs, but clearly those feathers were signs from her! My hunch is that if you have a close loved one in spirit that loved one may have been helping Jilly so she could give you signs that were so obvious that you could not ignore them. They are telling you that Jilly is fine, young and healthy again, and eager to once again kiss your face! If you would like a copy of The Fun of Staying in Touch, please send me a contact email through this website. And hug close those signs from her – now you’re sure that she is fine!

    1. I have another few items to share. I continue to find a feather every now and then. I had a particularly hard cry earlier this week, missing Jilly. I took our other dog, Jack, out for a walk a bit later, and there was another feather, just like the others I have found, in the usual spot. Also, one of my close friends had lost one of her dogs to lung disease a few days after Jilly died. We discussed my feathers just yesterday. She really misses her Mocha, and had taken her Louie out for a walk this morning. She and I are both a bit skeptical about signs, but low and behold, she found a feather this morning while walking Louie, and had never found one before. She was feeling really sad about Mocha and there it was. So, now we are both becoming much less skeptical and believing these are really signs from our babies. It is something to celebrate.

      1. If your beloved little friends are opening the two of you to beginning to understand that you and they really are eternal, then that is an incomparable gift!

  38. I lost my closest friend Dodger 3 months ago. He was my main source of happiness. He died in an fortunate way only 8 years old. I’ve only felt him once sleeping beside me the morning after he died. M not able to let go of him. I imagine him in at home and running up the stairs whenever I come home and feel happy but actually he’s not there. I haven’t received any signs of him at all and that worries me since we were have such an immensely strong bonding. What am I to believe?

    1. I’m so sorry, Dane – it’s terrible to lose someone you love, whether furry or not! Please be comforted to know that he is indeed at home now, in the truest sense, healthy and happy and forever young and eager to greet you when you go home as well! That you felt him sleeping beside you on the morning after he died was an extraordinary sign! Many animals and people will give us just one clear sign, then go on to enjoy the post-death realities. He may give you more, and just to make certain that you spot them I would be happy to send you a copy of The Fun of Staying in Touch if you will send me your email address through this website’s contact block and request the book. Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug!

  39. I lost my special little girl – Chloe – on Wednesday of this week. She was a Standard Poodle and we had the blessing of having her with us for 12 years. It was a complication of a very aggressive stomach cancer. I have prayed and meditated and prayed and meditated and have begged for some sort of a sign that she is with God. I haven’t seen a sign yet and I have to say that I’m heartbroken. I would not feel so anxious about the loss of a a close human friend as I truly know that they’ll be “home” again. But someone told me once when I was a child that animals don’t go to heaven. That conversation has haunted me my entire life. It makes me ill to think that Chloe has just been extinguished from her beautiful self to nothing at all.

    1. Hello and welcome! I’m very sorry to hear about your loss, but of course you know that twelve years is a good, long life for a larger dog. And she is for certain absolutely fine! One of the areas of this field where the evidence is most abundant and consistent is this, so we can state as fact that every animal that has been loved by a human being is alive in the afterlife, now young and healthy and waiting with joy to meet us. They are exactly the same personalities that they were when here! Whoever told you otherwise simply was unaware of how consistent and overwhelming the evidence is. So of course she is fine, and she may be sending signs, although animal signs are much less common than are signs from people. If you would like some help in looking for signs, please just send me a contact through this website and I will send you a PDF of The Fun of Staying in Touch. But whether or not you ever get signs, please be comforted to know that she is just fine!

  40. Thank you so much for writing this. My son has just lost his beloved Cocoa and I was scouring the internet for help with his coping. I think this article will definitely help him. He is worried because he heard in a church group that only humans have an afterlife and he thinks that means he will never get to see cocoa again. I think this will bring him some comfort.

    1. Hello Jamie! Please hug your son for me and tell him that God is perfect love and would never allow him to love so much and then to lose. That nonsense is a human teaching (as is so much that Christianity now espouses) – it did not come from Jesus! I have seen many first-hand accounts of the joyous reunions of people with their dogs, and I myself have been assured that my beloved horse is going to arrive at my deathbed so I can ride out on him! Upper-level beings tell us that our minds are extremely powerful and it is our own love for them that gives our animals eternal life in the afterlife levels.

      I don’t know your son’s age, but he might find Flying High in Spirit comforting. Mikey Morgan is a very advanced being who took a brief voluntary earth-lifetime so he would be able to better understand and teach modern people, and the first thing he did when he got back home was to fetch his golden retriever from the group home where she was waiting for him!

  41. Hello Roberta!

    I must say that I found this article as well as the comments of others to be very reassuring. My beloved kitty walked on this November; her health was rapidly failing and my family and I decided that it was best to give her mercy. She was nearly eighteen years old (as am I), and my parents adopted her just before my birth.

    I love to tell the story of how she came to be with us. She got a second chance as an Earthly being when my mother and father found her huddled beneath the stairs of the rural apartment house they were renting. The landlord was irresponsible (to put it kindly) and did not care for the many animals she kept. The litter of kittens into which mine was born did not survive; they had been born in a stall in the stable. The stall’s tenant, an ill-tempered, broken, abused Arabian horse, killed each of the kittens and gravely wounded the mama cat. Only the kitten that was to become ours was spared, and barely. She had been picked up by the tail and thrown at the wall, and how she survived that I do not know. My parents saw the resulting carnage, but did not believe there to be any survivors until they heard tiny, plaintive cries drifting up from beneath a staircase. There they found our tiny kitten, helpless, her beautifully patterned fur matted with blood. They got her to a veterinarian as quickly as possible, and they treated her but did not expect her to survive. She developed double pneumonia twice before she was a year old, and just kept fighting. I’m told that she was always protective of me after I was born… and she remained so for 17 years — which, I must say, is impressive for a cat that wasn’t expected to live past its first birthday.

    We made the most difficult decision I’ve been a part of when we chose to end her suffering. She was losing weight rapidly, her kidneys were failing, and it appeared that she had had a stroke at some point. She hid in the back of the closet, and we visited her often in her last days to tell us how much we loved her. I apologized for any harm I may have caused her. I asked her to send me a sign if she found herself in another realm after leaving this world.

    She walked on on November 13th, 2016.

    I have yet to receive a sign from her, and this hurts. I have been skeptical of an afterlife for some time — it just seems so illogical to me, but I know that my spirit and the bit of my intellect that deals with rational, mainstream science are at war now. It’s something I began to wonder about (I’ve been secure in my beliefs up to this point, mind you), following several deaths this year — both human and nonhuman. Some days I can believe, other days I can not. Then, of course, the larger questions I ask branch into smaller questions:

    “Forever is a long time. Wouldn’t it get boring? I mean, I’m bored now.”
    “Will I be able to do everything I enjoy here, on the Other Side?”
    “Will I wake up there and constantly be worried I’m imagining the whole thing? In that case, forever would be awful.”

    By far, however, my most nagging question is, “Why hasn’t my kitty made contact with me if she’s really anywhere?” I wonder now, after reading your article, she made contact and I missed it due to my over analyzing of everything in these past months. If she is somewhere, I hope it’s beautiful.

    I got a bit long-winded, but if you can help with any of my questions, that would be exquisite. Thank you again; it really helped me to cope even if I have trouble believing it completely.

    1. Oh Anna, please know that your beloved cat is purrfectly fine! It is indeed possible that you missed her signs, since most animal signs are subtle and you wouldn’t have known what to look for; and it is possible, too, that your grief hindered her ability to communicate with you (grief is a very low-vibration energy, so this kind of blockage happens often). But she is fine! As for your other questions, if you will send me a contact through this website I will be happy to send you PDFs of books that will help you better understand your own eternal nature, what happens at death, and how it is indeed possible to have an eternal life that doesn’t ever get boring! Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug. You write beautifully for someone so young, and my hope is that you will use that gift!

      1. Hello, again.

        Thank you for responding so quickly. You are truly a lovely soul, and your wisdom is brilliant.

        My email address is Anna.Kopetsky@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you, and reading more of what you have to say.

        I hope you have a wonderful evening! 🙂
        Anna

  42. Hello Robert, I came across this blog looking for comfort and hope after my beloved Yorkie died of sudden renal failure on November, 17, 2016. She was 3 days shy of her 12th birthday. She was the light and love of my life. My heart is shattered and I miss her so terribly. She was diabetic for a year and a half but was doing well. She suddenly got sick, stopped eating. She had always been a great eater. She was hospitalized for 6 days to receive supportative care for acute kidney failure. She did come home, but lasted 2 days and went into renal failure. We had to make the dreadful decision to let her go. She was the sweetest girl ever. She really stole my heart and she was always my number one priority. I feel so very sad and empty. Your article gives me hope that I will see her again and that she is ok somewhere beautiful. Naturally I do have doubts. She has sent me signs. I sometimes smell her or feel her around me. The most visible sign I received was the day after she died. I was lying in bed crying and crying. I asked God for a sign to let me know she is ok. I turned and looked at a painting that I have had for many years. I immediately see a cloud formation of what looks like my Emmy’s head. I have never before noticed it. Maybe it was always there, but I truly believed I noticed it that day to assure me that she is ok. I have also seen lots of rainbows on tv, social media and in paintings I see in stores. I hope these are all signs from my Emmy telling me she is ok. Thank you for writing this article and bringing some hope in a time when my heart is hopeless and broken.

    1. Oh my dear JoAnn, of course she is fine! You are receiving wonderful signs from her of the sort that animals sometimes give to us, but signs from our beloved animals are rarer than are signs from people so you are especially blessed! Please dry your eyes now and go on with living your best possible life – you know that is what she wants you to do. Be comforted and uplifted to know that one day before you know it you will arrive in an extraordinarily beautiful, earth-like place, and she will jump into your arms!

  43. Hi Roberta, thank you for responding. Thank you for your comforting words. I have also dreamt of her playfing with her toys, happy and healthy. She has given me kisses in my dreams. I also dreamt of her in the arms of my deceased Mom. I hope these are all signs that she is ok and happy. Thank you again. Have a wonderful day!

    1. Actually, Pamela, I know of two dogs that apparently reincarnated and were found and bought by the same owners – this connection was confirmed by a medium. And according to the owners, they even have all their old pets’ personality traits!

      1. Dear Roberta, can you please share the medium’s name? I would love to contact her as I’m going through a similar experience.

        1. Hello Mimi! I’m sorry, but I really don’t know of any reliable animal communicators. I wish I did know of someone, since so many would love to hear from their beloved pets!

  44. Hi Roberta it’s todd again wrote to u in may 2016 about my best friend max whom died suddenly. Now needing help with my elderly dog Bob I’ve had 12 and a half years he drags his back leg badly has been for a long time can’t bare putting him down but should I? He’s a shit shitzu. Still eats and no boo boos in the house but can’t do much. Do I put him down? Hating it

    1. I understand, Todd. Saying goodbye is hard. But all the evidence indicates that our animal friends are grateful when we help them to pass from lives that have become painful and difficult! At once they are young and happy and playing with others of their kind as they wait for us. Of course that is what you want for Bob! I had to have my cherished horse put down at almost 30 years old – I had owned him his whole life! – so I know that it rips your heart out even to think of finally making that call. But four days later my Beau thanked me by appearing as his now-young-and-beautiful self in a communication dream that I cherish to this day! It’s difficult for you, but it’s a gift for him. Please give Bob his favorite snack and then hold him in your arms and look into his eyes and tell him how much you love him, and let your vet assist him as he goes ahead to wait for you. He will be so grateful!

  45. Hi Roberta,
    I came across this site a few days before we needed to euthanize our sweet little Havanese, Ollie. He was only 7 when he died, and had a short life of many illnesses from the start. We found out he had kidney failure two weeks ago, and we knew that this illness, unlike the others, would be his last. We couldnt bare to see him suffer so we prepared ourselves and asked for a “sign” as to when exactly it would be done. He had a “good” day the day before his death. My daughter took the day off from school to spend time with him, and he ate and drank for her, let her brush him, and didnt shake with pain like he had days before. But that night, he awoke me from sleep and let me know it was time. Aside from my son who was at college and had to facetime his beloved buddy a goodbye, the rest of our family was with Ollie when he passed, comforting him and telling him we loved him with continuous tears. Absolutely the worst moment of my life. But my husband said at the moment of Ollie’s death, he felt a huge wave of peace. All I felt for two days was pure grief and loneliness.
    I have been asking Ollie to send me a sign that he is okay and last night I had a vivid dream. I was lying on my back and it was very hot and I was dehydrated and sweating, and suddenly a cool mist was being sprayed on me. I felt so much better and I looked around and sitting on a bench beside me was Ollie, and he was the one who was spraying me with the cool water. I immediately woke up and felt at peace.
    I had devoted my life to his for 7 years, not being able to work outside the home, or take a vacation with my family because Ollie needed medications around the clock and nobody would help. With him gone, I need to find purpose with my life, and from the dream I had, I feel like Ollie was taking care of me in my grief.
    When I awoke this morning, my husband said to me “I had a very vivid dream of Ollie last night. He was talking to me on a bench, and it didn’t really make sense but your sister was in it and she was talking in jibberish and Ollie was beside her sitting still”. Just some background for you..I havent spoken to my sister in about 7 years (the time we got Ollie) because we had a family fight over something that didn’t make much sense.
    Do you think this was Ollie communicating with both my husband and I in our dreams, and is he telling me from my husbands dream that I should talk to my sister? Thank you for your insight, your expertise and stories are very comforting.

    1. YES!! He is thanking you and telling you to get on with your life, and to reconnect with your sister as a first step! Our beloved pets, once they transition, become very much aware of our larger life picture, and their communications will sometimes show that they are aware of things that in their little animal bodies they likely would not have known. How beautiful!

      And if you need a further little sign from Ollie, you should know that you have just reached out to someone whose father’s name was Ollie ;-).

  46. Hi Roberta, a little over a week ago, we had to put my beloved cat Cuddles down and I wish we never had to. In december, my boyfriend brought his mom’s cat up here cause she passed away. We thought since they were sisters they would get along, but I guess being apart for over 5 years, changed that. So we had to put Cuddles in the bedroom and we let her out to see if she would be nice to the other cat and even after getting both of them fixed, Cuddles didn’t calm down and one night when I went in the bedroom to see Cuddles, she was laying on the left dresser and I walked over near her to pet her, at first she licked me on the nose and I rubbed her back for a few minutes and then I said I will be back in a little while and as soon as I started to leave, out of the blue, she attacked me. I never thought she would ever do that. I had to go to the ER. I was thinking she had enough of being in the bedroom and her domaine being invaded from another cat. Everytime I look at a picture of her, I start to cry. I always wonder if she’s thinking about me in heaven and knows how sad I am.

    1. Kim, if I understand you correctly she was put down because she attacked you? And since of course she was upset about being confined and about having that other cat in her territory, and you understand that, it would not be surprising for you to be feeling guilty now. One of the hazards that pet owners face is that pet deaths so often seem to have been to some extent under our control, and we can feel guilty – even if the death was unavoidable – which very much worsens our grief. It’s going to be essential that you forgive yourself! If you will send me a contact through this website, I will send you a PDF of The Fun of Growing Forever. You have got to get over your sense of guilt in this!

      To answer your question, if you and she had a love connection then that connection continues. She is indeed aware of your feelings now. And please be assured that we have seen no instance where an animal that was put down ever has blamed its human companion for the death. Ever! So all is well, dear. Your only task now is to tackle and master your own guilty feelings!

      1. Hi, thanks for the reply. I’m doing a little better today. My email is included in the required area. That’s sweet of you to send me the book. Have a good day!

  47. Hello Roberta,

    This page has been the only thing giving me solace over the last 5 days .

    My 12 year old eqyptian mau was attacked and killed by a dog we were watching when we went out for an hour for our anniversary, came home to the end of everything . I am beside myself with greif and guilt. I keep blaming myself, and I just want to feel like she knows I never would of ever intentionally put her in harms way.

    I guess my question is. Do you think when I communicate out loud she can hear me, and that she knows how incredibly sorry I am.

    I have so many Un answered questions

    1. I’m so sorry, Courtney! What a tragedy, and especially when you blame yourself so much. Yes, your cat (she’s a cat, right?) is fine, and she can hear you and knows that you are sorry and you never would have dreamed of doing her harm. She knows! Whenever we love a companion animal, it develops an independent existence and waits for us there, healthy and happy; and without time, it will feel to her as if you are joining her in mere moments even if fifty years have passed. (I know this all sounds too good to be true, but the evidence is consistent and overwhelming that it IS true!)

      Now your main task is to forgive yourself, for her sake as well as for your own! Please send me a contact through this website and I will send you a PDF of The Fun of Growing Forever, which contains the best forgiveness exercise that I know. It really works! Bless you, dear, and please know that there is peace and joy again beyond this pain, and your dear little friend will be even happier than you are when you finally get there!

  48. I had to euthanized my beloved 15 year dog yesterday in Mexico. I am down here in an RV. I picked him up off the streets of Mexico 14 years ago. I was unable to get him cremated to take his ashes and had to bury him here. He will be 3000 miles from where Iive. I am not a particular believer in afterlives etc, but if there is one, will his spirit follow me home?

    1. Paul, there is indeed an afterlife, and if you would like to know more I would be happy to send you a PDF of my book, The Fun of Dying. Please just request it of me through this website. And wonderfully, where your dog is now there is no time and there is no distance; and the only motivator is love, so if your dog loves you he will be wherever you are! He may even be among those who will eventually appear at your deathbed to greet you with doggie kisses and help to lead you home. So please be at peace about this!

  49. Hi Roberta. I wrote you back in Novemeber, about my Jilly passing away from heart failure. Although it is much easier to bear, I still miss her terribly. My mother and I were out on a visit, and we got to talking about how preious she was and how we both still miss her. But just last night, I had a very vivid dream about her. This is the first time I have had a dream about her since her passing. It was so heart-warming and encouraging. There she was, back with me. And I was even telling others in my dream that she was back, and taking her around to see them all. If only it were true. I don’t have any idea how the dream ended, I just remember her being there, fully alive, and even thinner (I even remarked that she was “healed” and no longer had the fluid noted in her abdomen, she was trim and able to move about in any way she desired). I am surmising that this may have been her telling me it is time to move on, and that she is fine. I also hope she is telling me she loves me and will always be with me. I just wanted to know your thoughts on this. You have no idea how much you have helped me through this grief.

    1. Kathy, that sounds like a communication dream, and if it still seems vivid to you then it certainly was. We all travel out of our bodies during sleep, and you have been meeting and playing with her at night but since your grief continues to be so strong your guides have allowed you to remember a bit of that interaction in an effort to help you move on. I had a communication dream from my horse four nights after his death that still remains vivid for me a decade later! Please consider that dream to be your confirmation that she is healthy and happy now, she loves you, and while your body sleeps you are spending a lot of time with her. She’ll be waiting for you when you also graduate. It really is time for you to move on with your life, knowing that you’ll see her again!

  50. Dear Roberta, I am consumed with grief having lost my sweet (dog) Miyagi in my arms at only 6 years old after being trampled by a horse. She died in my arms trying to race her to an emergency animal clinic. Would you please send me the PDF you mentioned to others (The Fun of Dying)? These posts are helpful to read but I am really having a hard time losing my friend who I loved so incredibly much. I can’t eat, sleep & I can’t stop crying. Thank you for the reassuring responses to everyone, it does help reading them. You are an angel.

    1. I’m so sorry, Therese! I have emailed two books to you in PDF; I hope they’ll help. Do you feel guilty at all about what happened? This sort of intense grief often has a component of feeling guilty that you didn’t avoid the accident. But please be at peace about that! Your Miyagi is fine, healthy and happy and waiting for you. Getting through these first days is always tough, but as your grief begins to lessen I hope that it comforts you to know that she is fine, you will see her again, and she really doesn’t blame you!

      1. Yes Roberta, you are exactly right, I feel terrible that I could not protect her & I wasn’t quick enough to grab her when she pulled away from me. Thank you for your kind words, your fast response & most importantly for being here to help us all through our grieving. I did not know where to turn & I believe fate brought me to your site. Thank you from my heart & soul, I truly appreciate your guidance.

        1. Dear Therese, nearly always such frantic grief is grief plus either guilt or anger (or both). It’s important that you forgive yourself, your dog, the horse, and everyone involved in what happened! Forgive yourself and all of them from the heart. Only then will you be able to heal. She really is fine!!

  51. My orange tabby boy cat Yellow died unexpectedly of a tumor, I am dying of a broken heart ever since. Our bond was unexplainable, he was so submissive to me like a lover or child. Followed me everywhere, slept in my arms. every. single. night. He was like a human.

    He died in my apartment in my arms, I wanted to make sure his spirit is released in my home. We were all each other had, no other pets, no other family members, no roommate. He was cremated. His remains are in my home as well.

    Come to my surprise I haven’t gotten one sign he has visited me, he died 5 months ago. Despite my hopes ill ever be with him again, the lack of awareness he’s with me makes me very cynical about the idea that spirits visit us, await us after death.

    If anything it seems he’s on his next life assignment in the reincarnation process and I may never cross paths with him ever again.

    This realization is very depressing.

    I’ve heard of soul groups and reincarnation occurring after all the souls are joined again. I don’t know what to think anymore.

    What are your thoughts on my viewpoint, circumstance, and awareness?

    1. Dear Nathan, you really owe it to yourself to learn what actually is going on! That would bring you a great deal of comfort now. The evidence overwhelmingly indicates the following:

      1) Human life is eternal. You couldn’t die, sir, even if you wanted to.

      2) Every animal that you ever have loved is waiting for you in the afterlife, now young and healthy and happy. So assuredly, you WILL be reunited with your beloved cat again. They DO NOT return to earth – ever, we think – except that rarely they will reincarnate for a beloved owner. So you WILL see him again. Guaranteed!

      If you would like a PDF of The Fun of Dying, please let me know that through this website!

  52. I just lost my best friend in the entire world. She suffered from hermangiosarcoma and had her heart tapped two times. The other night when she was fighting to breathe we rushed her to the hospital and they put her on oxygen so that my mom could go and get my family members so that we could put her to sleep but I wanted everyone to be there and her feel the love. Unfortunately she passed a few minutes before they came and I feel so guilty and sad that we weren’t right beside her when she took her final breathe.. This pain is unbearable and I miss her a terrible amount. I’m waiting for her to visit me, I need to know that she forgives me and that she’s ok. I took care of her while she was alive and I’m constantly worrying about if she’s being cared for in the afterlife. The thought of her being in the afterlife but still looking back every so often to see if I’ll appear, really makes me sad. I just want my friend back

    1. Oh my dear Tiya, I’m not sure whether your friend is a cat or a dog, but please know that in either case she is perfectly fine, young and healthy, being very well cared for and loved in a group of others of her kind and playing happily while she waits for your arrival. There is no objective time where she is now, so even if you live here for another 100 years it will seem like mere moments for your friend before she turns and sees you calling to her. Really!

      I hear from so many who are in desperate grief over the loss of a pet, and in cases where the grief is as raw as yours there generally seems to be a lot of guilt mixed into it. My hunch is that is part of your problem, and I urge you please to forgive yourself! Our companion animals never blame us for anything – instead, they are always so grateful for the loving care that we gave them. So please stop worrying, forgive yourself, and go on with your life while knowing that you WILL see her again!

  53. I did the unthinkable this past Wednesday morning…I killed my fur buddy Squeaky (a cat) in the driveway on accident backing out. I have never hurt anything like that before in my life…let alone KILL it…and it was my own buddy. 🙁

    Squeaky had overcame a lot of insurmountable odds in her short life time of 5 years or so. She had a lot of trouble with allergies, she nearly died of pneumonia twice, she was infected with the brain parasite toxoplasmosis gondii as a kitten and was nearly killed then. She was damaged from it but she was relatively normal after which. Her sight was off kilter a bit and one eye dilated more than the other periodically as a result of that parasite…and she was beginning to suffer from hip dysplasia…but she fought every time and came out on top.

    She was my doppleganger. She followed me everywhere. She would expect treats and tidbits anytime I ate something. She would hop up for pettings…she would nose my nose…put her down and if she was not ready she came right back up. She had a real idiosyncrasy of NOT moving out of the way of vehicles or people real quick though….was never a problem til Wednesday AM.

    She had been out and I gave her her pettings and I started to back out and felt a small thump and next thing I know I saw her dart out from under the truck quickly with a limp and dart for the porch. I slam on the brakes and run over (as much as I can I am super heavy) and found her fallen over on her side already…she had already urinated and she was laying there writhing and trying to breathe…and not able…she had such a scared look on her and there was nothing I could do…all I could do is stroke her fur until she slipped into unconsciousness…I was coming apart…I felt/feel like the most worthless bastard on the planet….I just killed my buddy. Then I found something to wrap her up in and buried her over near the last cat I lost.

    That image is burned into my head…I don’t know I will ever forgive myself for killing such a sweet little soul…she had her problems but she wanted to live as much as anyone or anything…I just pray that she is okay now…there with the others that came before her and that she understands I did NOT do that to her deliberately…I would have give my leg before I ever hurt a hair on her….it was a horrific accident….but accident or not I have it to live with now.

    Do you think she understands I never meant to hurt her…let alone kill her?

    1. Dear Rich, please know that your cat is fine, and of course she doesn’t blame you! I understand that it’s hard to lose a furry friend, and when we feel responsible for the pet’s death then we can find it almost impossible to let go of the self-blame so it’s very important that you work on forgiving yourself. You might try the exercises in The Fun of Growing Forever: if you need the book, simply contact me through this website and I will send it to you in PDF. Meanwhile, though, please be comforted to know that Squeaky is fine now and she loves you and doesn’t blame you!

  54. Hello,

    My dog passed away not too long ago. Soon I will be leaving a place we called home for the past year and a half. My question is do you think my dog will be able to find me in my new location? I am afraid to move away in case her spirit is still with me. I just hope she can come with me. Thank you.

    1. This is a great question, Colleen! In fact, where your dog is now there is no space or time, and love is the only law; so of course she can find you wherever you are. Please don’t worry about that, and know that just your thinking about her will likely put her right there with you, wherever you are!

  55. Dear Roberta
    I am consumed with grief for my gorgeous French Bulldog, Noodle who I had to have put to sleep 2 days ago. He had a lot of health problems in his 10 years but had been the best he’d ever been over the past year. Last Sunday he was chasing his ball and crashed head first into a wooden bench. The vet could find no problem but 2 days later he went blind and the vet said there was a huge build up of fluid behind his eyes and she didn’t think it could be rectified. As he was already stone deaf and only had one eye I didn’t think it was fair to keep him. I am distraught as I live alone and feel so empty. I do walk and board other people’s dogs but I can’t go through this pain again so don’t want another. I am an atheist though I do believe in spirits and would feel so much better if Noodle gave me a sign but I’m not sure it will happen.

    1. Dear Linda, you gave your little friend such a gift! He wasn’t happy in such a defective body, and now he is gloriously free, healthy and happy and playing with other dogs in a beautiful place while he waits for you. His wait won’t even feel long to him, because there is no time there! It doesn’t matter whether you are an atheist, since frankly the judgmental and human-like God that Christians preach doesn’t actually exist; but Noodle is fine now, and much happier. That is certain. It is likely that your grief is so extreme that it will block his being able to give you signs, so please concentrate on forgiving yourself for giving him the gift of his freedom, and as you feel better the signs may well come!

      1. Dear Roberta, thank you so much for your prompt reply, I immediately bought 3 of your books and I can’t tell you how much better I’m feeling after reading 2 of them. The Fun of Dying answers so many questions. When I cry for Noodle now it’s because I miss his company but inside I am so happy he is well again and can see and hear. I am now going to read the third book and I suspect I shall be reading all 3 over and over, thank you for giving me such an insight to what lies ahead.

        1. Dear Linda, you ought to thank Noodle! He knew that you needed to read my books, and he led you here. He loves you very much! If you ever have questions, of course, don’t hesitate to contact me through this website.

          1. Dear Roberta,
            I just wanted to let you know that on Saturday I was travelling on the underground (tube) with my daughter and an orange and white butterfly was flying round us and even landed on my daughters leg and my seat! I have lived in London all my life and have never before seen a butterfly on an underground train. Maybe it was a sign from Noodle, I like to think so. I have read all 3 books and take great comfort from them, especially The Fun of Dying. I do have a problem with the concept of total forgiveness ( The Fun of Growing Forever). When you see evil people beheading , burning people alive and making slaves of young girls or torturing animals, how is it possible to feel forgiveness? I can see that in the bigger picture it may be the right thing to do but I just feel hatred for these people! Maybe when I pass over it will come naturally to me, I hope so as I don’t want anything to get in the way of my wonderful reunion with all my dogs and family! Thank you again for giving me hope with your books, Linda.

  56. I just lost my sweetgirl “Sweetie” on Sunday July 2, 2017. I was giving her heart medicine and she died in my arms closed to my heart. Although, information states that heart attacks are rare in dogs, I believe this is what happened. My heart is broken. She fought hard to stay with me, I know this!
    She had a spell a week before where I thought she was dead and then she came back. At the time I couldn’t hear a heart beat. I in the health care field so I know how to assess these vital signs. I think Sweetie died and come back for a few more days, then she left abruptly. I noticed a few days before she died she cried with tears, crocodile size tears dripping. I had never seen this before. Information can be found that dogs don’t cry. Hogwash, she was crying and I now know why. She knew from the first episode that she was going to leave me. I am having a difficult time of it. I have had ADCs before and wish that she could send a sign to me.

    1. Dear Sheri, she may have been crying about your sadness, but in truth she was eager to go home! Repeatedly, dogs that communicate say this to us. Once they arrive there, they have healthy young bodies and they get to play with other dogs all day long! She is waiting there for you, and the time that passes won’t even feel long to her since there is no objective time. As your grief lessens, you may well get signs, so watch for them – my own dearest animal friend was a horse, and he came to me in a dream. You can’t know what Sweetie might do, so be vigilant!

  57. I lost my beautiful doggie on 25th Feb this year. She was 13 when she passed and there hasn’t been a day since I lost her that I haven’t cried. My husband couldn’t bear the emptiness in our home so we have recently rescued another doggie who is beautiful and has had a really awful start in life. She’s lovely and has filled the void in my husbands life but I just can’t move on. I miss Kita so much and can’t bring myself to bond with our new dog, Honey. I feel terrible feeling this way but I just want my girl and nothing else. I feel sadder now than when I lost my mum 15 years ago 😭

    1. Dear Sue, please understand first of all that your dog is fine and healthy and is waiting for you in a beautiful place where she gets to play with other dogs and is well cared for and loved. You will see and play with her again soon!

      Please know, too, that when grief for a pet is as intense as yours is, nearly always it is complicated by feelings of guilt. I suspect that this is your case, too. Most often people fret that they shouldn’t have put the pet down, or that they should have done it sooner; or they are anguished that they didn’t notice signs of illness sooner, or that they weren’t there when the pet died or that they did or didn’t do some other thing. Please know, dear, that in all these years I have never heard of a case where a pet who has died has communicated anything but profound love and gratitude! Your dog DOES NOT blame you for whatever you believe you did wrong, and her only wish is that you will stop blaming yourself and go on to love this new dog, too!

    1. Hello Chel! Yes, sometimes less traditional kinds of pets will communicate. Whenever there is a love connection, communication can happen easily. One of my own two communication dreams was a wonderful visit from my treasured horse!

  58. My cat that was only four years old died suddenly one week ago today. I have cried everyday since, and it only seems to be getting worse. I miss her so much! She stayed outside, but I brought her in a lot. I’m not sure what happened to her, and no vets nearby were open since it was the weekend. I have other cats, but she was my favorite of all time. What can I do to feel better?

    1. I’m sorry for your loss! Please understand that your cat is fine and will be waiting for you when you transition – that is the glorious truth about our love-relationship with our furry friends. Generally when people are as stricken as you are, there is an overlay of either guilt or anger. In your case, since you so quickly say that she was an outdoor cat but “I brought her in a lot,” I think you are feeling guilty about the fact that it may well have been something that she encountered outside that killed her. And this is actually likely to be true. But for you to blame yourself is useless at this point! Cats love to be outdoors – we say about our own cat that “she wants to take her life into her own paws,” and we let her do that. All that you need to do, dear, is to forgive yourself and your little friend that you gave her what she most wanted, and it ended up shortening her life. Forgive both of you! Unless you do that, you won’t be able to move on, and that is the last thing that she would have wanted.

  59. Thank you! I miss her so much! I will never ever forget her. I will try my best to take care of my other pets. Do you think she can see me? I hope to see her again someday.

    1. And to make matters worse, I feel guilty. I didn’t bring her in for the past few months because I’ve been busy doing different things. If I had known she wasn’t going to live, I would have spent every second I could with her. The last time I saw her before she died, she rolled over so I could rub her belly and I did. That makes me happy I did that.

      1. I knew it! Your problem is this guilt, most of all – it isn’t simply grief. You’ve got to forgive yourself now, or you might never get over feeling so terrible! My book, The Fun of Growing Forever, has a great forgiveness exercise – I urge you to read it and strictly follow that exercise – it works!!

  60. I know I shouldn’t feel this way, and I know my cat wouldn’t want me to worry about her. I feel better than I did. I just hope she knew how much I loved her. Hopefully I will see her again someday.

  61. I hope so much to see all of my old pets again. We just lost a cat last week and I can’t stop thinking about him. Wishing I could give him a hug one last time. Thanks for the hope.

    1. David, every pet that you ever have loved will be waiting there, now young and healthy. Don’t even worry about it! Your only problem will be that they all will want to greet you at once, and you will have trouble getting hugs from people until after you have petted and hugged all the animals ;-).

  62. Roberta, I have been feeling so bad lately ever since my cat got sick and died. I love/d her so much, and it is so heartbreaking that she is no longer here. Do you really believe she is in Heaven, and if so do you think she knows how much I love and miss her? I had a dream about her last night…

    1. Saige, she is fine! And she loves you, and she knows that you love her. If your dream of her felt vivid and remained with you beyond lunchtime, then it may well have been a communication dream from her… those dreams tend to remain with us and they don’t fade. But whether or not it was a communication, please be comforted to know that you will be with her again!

  63. Dear Roberta. We put our 14.5 year old border collie, Diggety, down yesterday. It is terrible loss for all of us. He was old, in pain, losing his hind legs, and suffering. We gave him a wonderful send off yesterday and all 4 of us were in the room for his passing. It is very sad and we are all heart broken. Last night, my 11 year old daughter comes into my room around 2 a.m. crying hysterically. She said she had a nightmare. We let her sleep in our room. I asked her when we woke up what her dream was about. She said that it wasn’t a dream. She woke up in the middle of the night to fix her pillows. She rolled over and saw our dog sleeping next to her. She said he had shiny, silky fur and he looked beautiful. She reached over to pet him and then she saw a flash of light, like a car’s headlight, and then he disappeared. She got scared and came to our room. I told her she was the luckiest person in the world because he came to tell her that he is OK. This is the most beautiful thing I have ever heard. Can pets come back this fast to let us know they are OK? His passing is less than 24 hours. Is the transition that quick? This dog was truly a wonderful pet and he never liked seeing us upset. I am hoping he is happy and feeling at peace.

    1. What a terrific sign! The shiny fur is telling, since whenever pets do this – it seems to be just dogs, and it’s rare – they glow with light. The flash of spiritual light as it ends tends to be visible only in darkness or near-darkness. That was absolutely a visit from Diggety, he is fine, and your daughter is blessed indeed!

  64. My cat had four kittens. She leaves them sometimes but always comes back several times a day for them to get milk. I have been trying to help each of them while she is gone, but one of them unfortunately died today. He was the runt of the litter. I feel terrible about it because I didn’t really do much for it today! The cat tried to help it too, but it was too late. Do you think it is in Heaven now and I will get to see it again?

    1. Meg, often the runt of a litter will die so you must not blame yourself for its death! The way your cat has been behaving is the way she would behave in the wild: going out to hunt, and coming back to nurse. What if you hadn’t been there at all? The kitten would have died just the same! And that would not have been your fault, either. Please forgive yourself – nothing whatsoever about this is your fault!

  65. All of these comments and entries are regarding accidents and health issues. I am struggling more that I could have ever imagined because I had to put my dog down on Monday for aggressive tendencies. She was the most loyal and loving dog to me. She did not like most other dogs and definitely did not like strangers. She appeared to be on guard and nervous all the time. She attacked numerous puppies that had been brought into the home. I put her on medication and even brought in a trainer. I kept making excuses for her behavior but finally decided for the safety of others to put her down. I have never loved a dog so much and can’t get past the grief of taking her life. I feel I need to know that she isn’t mad or feeling abandoned.

    1. Theresa, she isn’t angry and she doesn’t feel abandoned! What you did for her was to release her from a life that can’t have been much fun for her, always being stressed and fearful and feeling the displeasure of humans when she didn’t really understand why, and I’m sure she is grateful for that. What you’ve got to do is forgive yourself!! Most of what you think is grief right now is really severe guilt and self-blame, and until you can get beyond it you won’t be able to get past feeling terrible about this. You did the right thing, for her and for everyone! And once you have forgiven yourself you will be able to send her the love and forgiveness that she really needs to feel from you now. Think of her with love, and when you see her again she will be past all these issues and you two will be able to enjoy one another forevermore!!

  66. I have lost one of my special friends. My cat had three kittens, and unfortunately there were no survivors. She struggled so much. I tried to help her the best I could. I really hate it about my cat. She was so special to me, and I miss her so much! I know I should have gotten her fixed, but I didn’t think she would get pregnant so soon. All I can do is hope that she is with her little kittens now while waiting on me.

    1. Misty, your little friend is just fine. What you’ve got to do is forgive yourself – you are blaming yourself for not getting her fixed, and you must forgive yourself for that. Grief for a pet generally eases within months, but when it is complicated by anger or grief it can go on indefinitely! Please, please don’t do that to yourself. Forgive yourself, send her your love, know for a certainty that you will see her again, and go on to have other cats and kittens. The beauty of the love that we have for our animals is that it will infinitely stretch. You can love as many as you like in this lifetime, and all of them will be there to welcome you home!

  67. I just had my precious poodle put to sleep less than an hour ago. I will miss her dearly, but thanks to Roberta’s blog and books and all of you I was prepared to ask for and notice the many signs that were sent to assure me she is happy running around in Summerland. As we were burying her and arrow made from cloudsappeared in the sky above her grave…pointing upward of course. My last few days have been filled with meaningful signs in songs. Last night I was flipping through channels trying to occupy my mind and on E news of all places the reported that the Pope had told a young boy that he would see his dog in heaven. It caught my attention bc many Catholics believe that animals don’t go to heaven. I googled this happening so I could read the whole story and it seems that it happened way back in 2012 or 2014 based on the articles I found. I can hardly believe E news would be reporting this on that particular day so many years later. Thank you Roberta and everyone who has loved an animal as much as I have and believes that they are part of us forever!!!!

    1. Hello, and please be comforted – all is well! I’m delighted that you are already getting signs, and hearing that even the Pope is recognizing now that our beloved animals will be greeting us when we go home is wonderful. Your dog is young and happy and healthy now, and while she waits for you she is having lots of fun!

  68. Am reading this just for reassurance after our beloved German Shepherd suddenly died of a ruptured spleen/internal bleeding on Saturday. The day is full of reminders that he is no longer with us. Very depressing. But am confident that we will meet again under the circumstances you describe. I just wish the pain of his departure was not so great.

    1. Dear CPH, your attitude is wonderful, and indeed it is going to be such bliss when you see him again! Grief is a natural process, and unless it is complicated by either anger or guilt the worst of it generally passes within months. Please forgive yourself for anything you think that you might have done wrong in your dog’s life, knowing that he doesn’t blame you at all and he continues to completely love you. Truly, you will be together again!

  69. Roberta, what can I do to feel better? I found a kitten by himself six weeks ago today. I have a cat that recently had kittens, so she let him nurse her. I thought everything was going so well. A few days ago, I noticed he was a little skinnier, but not too skinny. I made sure he got food, water, and milk. Unfortunately, I found him dead this morning. I am so sad! I love him so much! Do you truly believe animals get to go to Heaven and that I may get to see him again?

    1. The kitten is fine! It is likely that he had a congenital issue, which was why his mother abandoned him. But every animal that we ever have loved is safe, young and healthy in a beautiful place where they are all receiving loving care, so please don’t worry about your little friend at all. What you must do is to forgive yourself; that is generally the worst aspect of the grief that we feel when an animal dies. Please understand that there was nothing whatsoever that you could have done to save him, and rejoice in knowing that he is fine and indeed you will be together again in a beautiful greater reality where love never ends!

  70. Roberta, I have been so devastated! My cat had six kittens. They are all so healthy and beautiful, but one got up in the golf cart and unfortunately got killed two days ago. The cat had moved them two days before, but I brought them back. I can’t help but feel that I mad a really bad mistake. I have cried ever since because I could’ve looked up in the golf cart or I could’ve just left them alone where the cat moved them to. All I can do is think about what I did wrong. I also don’t have any pictures of her, so that is making me sad too. I can only hope that one day I will get to see her again, as well as all my other pets.

    1. Mina, you MUST forgive yourself! You could not have known that your moving the kittens would cause a problem, and everything that you did in this was loving so you absolutely are not at fault at all! Yes, you will again see all the animals you ever have loved; don’t fret about that. Please be at peace, dear! Nothing that happened in this was your fault at. Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug!

  71. Thanks for all your knowledge and comments, Im so sad, I had to put to sleep my poor Max 3 days ago, a black Cat of 20 years old, he has been with us since then, he had a kidney faillure and I never expected he would die so soon, he got so sick in only one week, but he was suffering, couldnt walk or eat, so there was no other choice, but it hurted me so much to do that, I wanted to leave that decision to God and only to God, but it was impossible and I feel kind a guilty for that. We have not received any sign how I wish I could dream of him and see him jumping and playing, healthy and beautiful as he was , why I cant dream of him ? will he be mad at me for putting him to sleep? God knows I loved him so much and I am suffering a lot for the loss……… 🙁

    1. Oh Sonia, please don’t blame yourself for doing the right thing for your little friend! When we hear from euthanized pets, they ALWAYS thank us for releasing them; I have never heard of a case where the animal was not grateful for the gift of being freed from that damaged body. And Max is right now young, happy, healthy, and waiting for you in a beautiful home with other cats also waiting for their people to arrive. You will be with him again, and meanwhile he is being lovingly cared for and having a wonderful time!!

      1. Thanks so much for your answer Roberta, I sincerely hope he can communicate with me soon, so my heart feels much better ¡¡¡ your words healed my heart a lot……..

  72. Roberta, thank you!

    Just over 2 months ago I lost my princess, Tiny, and 1 month after we released her from the pain, my prince, Tank, was diagnosed with the same cancer. I know the outcome is imminent and am a mess. Tiny broke my heart and any ounce that was left is shattered by Tank being sick and having to go through it all again when I didn’t get a chance to mourn Tiny. They are my life and soulmates and I am struggling with the loss of Tiny and soon Tank. I just want to be reunited with them. That’s all I have to hope for. I don’t want to wait 50 odd years for it. I need to know it is 150% guaranteed they will be there, waiting for us to all go home together again for all of eternity. You have no idea how much your words and sureties are comforting me.

    1. Dear Bellamy, I have been doing afterlife research for half a century. Everything I am telling you is as real as the sun and the stars are real! Indeed, the evidence for survival of our companion animals is so solid that it is one of the things of which we are most certain. Every animal that a human being ever has loved is waiting for us when we transition, now young and healthy and overjoyed to see us again! So please give Tank the gift of his release from pain, just as you did for Tiny. He will be very grateful to you – I promise you that!

      This early goodbye is a part of the deal that we make when we take a dog or cat into our lives (or – as in my case – even a horse). It is a primary reason why I haven’t ha a companion animal of any kind in more than a decade: I have had quite enough of the pain of losing beloved pets for this lifetime! But never fear for a moment: all your little friends are fine.

      1. Thank you Roberta, we reunited Tank with Tiny today. Our hearts are shattered…I could tell he was ready. No matter how much time passed, I’d have never been ready.

        Now I look forward to being reunited with them both and taking them home one last time, yet for eternity. I love them with my whole life and being. I just pray they know how much we adore them and that we assisted in their transition with only their best intentions in our heart. Not us be selfish and keep them here in pain just so they could fight to survive to please us and keep us happy when them being in pain doesn’t make us happy.

        1. They can feel your love, of course, and they are grateful to you for letting them go home! Be comforted to know that they are young and happy now, and where they are there is no time so it will likely seem to them that only moments will have passed before they are welcoming you with puppy-kisses!

  73. I just found this site, my heart goes out to everyone experiencing the loss if a companion. Thank you for taking the time to kindly address everyone, Roberta.

    I lost my cat Arthas, the love of my life, just 2 days ago due to kidney stones. My sister & I had him since he was 3 months old, & he was only about 5 & 1/2, still very young. I feel I cannot function, I feel like I can’t go on. He was my everything, the life of the whole house, & I keep seeking some type of solace & so badly need him to know we love him more than anything, that he was our world.

    I couldn’t be in the room when he was put down. My sister could barely muster the strength to, but she did it for him as she did it for him as we were determined he wouldn’t be alone. She said he looked up at her as she held his head, & locked eyes, then just faded away a few seconds after he was injected. She can’t stop feeling guilty & blaming herself for his last day being painful.

    We will be bringing his ashes home in about a week, I’m hoping I’m lucky enough to receive a visit from him. I don’t know if people are told they’re okay & we’ll see them again purely for our own comfort, or if it’s really true, but I need to believe more than anything that it is.

    Thank you for reading this.

    1. Dear Norah, I am vastly cynical, and more so than ever since afterlife researchers have found parts of a gigantic truth and the last thing that we ever would do would be to muck that up with wishful thinking! One of the things of which we are most certain – because those that we used to think were dead so frequently mention it – is that EVERY ANIMAL WE EVER HAVE LOVED IS WAITING FOR US WHEN WE TRANSITION, NOW YOUNG AND HEALTHY. Every one of them! So people who have loved a lot of pets will be literally mobbed when they arrive, and that is something that their human loved ones will sometimes crank about – that they can’t get through all the dogs and cats to finally hug their returning loved one ;-).

      I am sorry for your pain, but please absolutely banish any thought you might have that a cat who was so much loved on earth is dead. She is not! And if you can manage to tamp down your pain enough – please forgive yourself! – then she will try to give you signs of her survival. Just keep sending her love, give yourself the gift of forgiveness and peace, and keep your eyes wide open!

  74. My friend Carsen died Sept 29 2017 early in the morning hours has I slept. I feel terrible guilt for not waking for him. His 12th birthday would have been on halloween. I adopted him from the Omaha humane society when he was 2 months old. Carsen was a beautiful soul, a beautiful Tricolor Sheltie. He and I have had our share of hard times, and without him I’m not sure where I would be. Carsen and I were very tight, he went everywhere with me. I am still in so much pain for his loss and pray that he is ok and being taken care of. A few days after he passed I was sitting in front of my computer and I was nodding off cause it was 12:24 am. Suddenly I heard Boo bark by the front door like he has done so many times before and I said outloud “just a second boy”. Realizing that Carsen was gone I lifted my head and he barked again, very loud. I turned and looked at the door and I saw Carsen walk from the door to the place on the carpet where he died. He looked strong and young, it was a blackened image not of his body when he was alive. But I could tell it was Boo. Then on November 18th, I could here noises in the kitchen and I grabbed my camera and took two pictures about 5 seconds apart. The first picture showed 5 orbs floating about and a large orange glowing mist on the floor. The second picture, all were gone. I remember on a late afternoon laying down on the bed sideways with my legs hanging halfway off, and I could feel Carsen walk under my shins, actually lifting my legs. I knew it was him I could feel his back and shape.
    Now I don’t know if I am going insane losing my mind cuz i miss him so. I do keep my camera close by from now on. So much pain and guilt comsume me. I took Carsen to the vet at least once every 2 months whether he was sick or not. He was diagnosed with an enlarged heart and given enalipril, which was causing him to have seizures. The vet said no, so i took him to another vet and she didn’t think so either and suggested i take him to Colorado state university in Fort Collins, CO. Which I did and we saw a cardiologist. She said he didn’t have an enlarged heart but heart valve degeneration and that it wasn’t bad enough to have to be on medicine. So I stopped the meds and the seizures stopped and Carsen died 3 months later. So who to believe, can’t trust vets, I feel I done Carsen wrong. Thanks for listening, sorry I am so windy.

    1. Dear Don, yours is the classic problem of every one of us who loves a furry friend! You are likely to live at least 80 years, but the most a dog can manage is maybe 15. I have a friend who calls puppies “pain in a fur wrapper.” We know when we adopt the pup that our time together will be brief!

      There is no earthly way that you could have prolonged his life, or that a hundred veterinarians working together could have prolonged his life, and you know in your heart that you did every human thing that you could do for him; but nearly all of us, when we lose a beloved pet, feel considerable guilt about not having saved them. Surely there was something more we could have done! But of course, thinking that way is irrational, Don. I’m sure you know that. You did everything that you could have done!

      You were blessed with the gift of a truly beautiful soul, and now that he has gone on ahead he is so concerned about you that he has been giving you some really spectacular signs! His life was a gift, and those signs are a gift. Please be comforted now, knowing that your little Carsen is young and healthy again and is patiently waiting for you in a beautiful place where love never ends.

      1. Thank you Roberta, I hope to end my guilt one day. I wonder why Carsen did not come to me when he appeared that night. I am either out of my mind or I did see what i saw. But why wouldn’t he walk to me? He barked twice, very loud, to get my attention but didn’t walk to me. I find that odd, because I know he loved me just as much as I love him. So why?

        1. Don, he was not in his material body! I have never heard of an animal in spirit who ever approached a material owner. His body is there to be seen but never touched! Please just be joyous that you saw him, and you know that he is fine!!

  75. I know what i saw, He looked so strong and he had his tail up high. I don;t drink and i wasn’t asleep. so i try to accept that i am not nuts. Do you think he is being treated ok? I spent 12 years of Carsen being the first thing i thought of when I awoke and the last thing when we went to sleep. I have to know he is ok and not being hurt.

    1. HE IS FINE! He is living in a group home, young and healthy and cared for by people who love him and playing with his wonderful doggy friends! Best of all, where he is now there is no time, so it will seem to him to be only moments before you show up – having died at 97 – and take him home with you forevermore!

    1. Don, you could not possibly upset me. But you can do something very important for me now: you can forgive yourself! That’s the only gift that you can give to Carsen, and it’s the reason he took the trouble to give you post-death signs. Please, please forgive yourself!!

  76. Roberta,
    I have been feeling so down lately just remembering my favorite cat who died 4 months ago. She was only 4 years old. I feel like I didn’t get to spend enough time with her. I don’t know what to do. I haven’t gotten any sign from her even though we loved each other very much. Sometimes, though, I see her face in some of my other cats. I wish I could’ve gotten her to a vet because they probably could’ve saved her, but none were open that day and I didn’t know she was so sick beforehand since she was missing the two days before.

    1. Kelly, your primary problem is the guilt that you feel surrounding her death. Your guilt is a useless burden now, and your little friend really is fine!! Please forgive yourself, and know that she continues to love you, she does not blame you, and she will be waiting for you when your turn comes. You MUST forgive yourself, or you never will feel any better and that is the last thing that your little friend would want!

  77. I googled dogs and the after life and your article popped up. We had to put our beloved Spanky down just last week after a long battle with Cushings disease. Even knowing it was the right decision, I miss him terribly. 😪 We opted to have him cremated and yesterday morning early I thought I heard him yelp. He had been doing that to let us know he needed to go out. Later in the day I received a call from the pet crematory. It made me feel sad but comforted to know my dog was sending me a signal that he is okay. Thank you so much.💔

    1. Heh – April, Google has sent many people to this blog post, and I’m glad that it sent you here as well! I’m so glad that you had that little sign from him, dear, and please know that he is very grateful indeed that you freed him from that body that no longer served him so he can be young and healthy again!

  78. Hi, I’m sorry to bother you, my wife and i have just put our 17 year old jack russell ‘Peanut’ to sleep yesterday, his poor little body was shutting down, 5 years earlier we had to put our lab ‘Nugget’ to sleep (bone cancer in her nose) peanut and nugget were the best of friends. I’m hoping you tell me if they’re okay? do they miss us? Did Nugget await Peanut when he crossed over? I can imagine you get many requests and i hope you can find it in your heart to reply to this long-winded request. Thank you from Troy, Sheri, Teggun (peanuts 5 year old lab sis) and Kinder (peanuts 4 year old kelpie sis)
    I miss him so much.

    1. Troy, please know that everyone is fine! I am not a pet-communicator, but I can assure you that the evidence of what happens at and after the death of a pet is abundant and absolutely consistent: every animal that we ever have loved transitions easily, and is now young and healthy and waiting for us in a beautiful, earth-like place, being cared for until we come to pick it up. It is very likely that your lab and your Jack Russell greeted one another, since their energies would be similar; but in any event, pets seem not to have a sense of time in the afterlife so it will seem to each of your animals that they have only just arrived when you come for them, even if it’s after a very long earth-life!

  79. Thank you so much.
    We really appreciate it.
    You have really put our minds at ease. Do you know if they have visited us?
    Thanks again

    1. I’m not surprised that they have visited! Your family should them in your hearts, dear Troy, until the moment when you will again hold them in your arms!

  80. Roberta,

    You are an amazing human being. I just stumbled upon your website and can´t wait to read more. I read about NDE’s for over a decade but only now i’m searching for specific cases involving pets. We just lost our beloved 15y.o. Lhasa, and the pain and the emptiness are almost unbearable. He was special beyond words. This article alongside similar others i’ve found are really heart-warming, leaving me with no doubt that we will one day reunite. Keep up your good work of bringing this good news to everyone who lose their little special friends.

    1. Thank you for your kindly words, Russell! Just know that your little friend is fine, and you soon will be together again. The news really is all good, and all beautiful!

  81. Greetings;
    I just want to share my experience. I had to put down my 15.5 year old Pom; his name was Buddy. I said goodbye on Oct 21st. Had him since he was 3 months. Heartache is putting it lightly! I had to seek therapy to process the grief.
    The day after I said goodbye; Hugo (my other little dog) and I went to a park where we all used to walk. We have been walking this park for years. It was late in the evening…getting dark. Suddenly out of nowhere I got a scent of flowers; strong scent. I looked around thinking there may be a lady around wearing perfume…nothing! Again; we have walked this park for years; there are no flowers around or any trees that would give off scents. I know that I know with all my heart that was Buddy’s way of letting me know he was around. The next day Hugo did not want to sleep on the bed with me. They used to both sleep on the bed with me. Hugo slept on the floor next to my bed…I of course could not sleep so I was wide awake. Hugo suddenly jumped and looked around as if something startled him. I believe it was Buddy again visiting. I had Buddy cremated and a few weeks after I went to my backyard to bury the little ash box. I never wanted to cremate but my sister talked me into it. When I went to the backyard..just me and Hugo…there where lots of feathers in the spot where we were going to bury the ashes. At the time it didn’t mean much to me but then I read about feathers. Just wanted to share this with you. I believe with all my heart they live on and they visit. Love never dies!!!!!!!!!

    Olga

    1. AMEN, Olga! You are fortunate that you are getting such wonderful signs, but the key is that you are open to receiving them. It is likely that every loved animal tries to send some sort of sign, but too many people simply dismiss these signs as coincidences. Thank you for sharing your story with us!

  82. You are welcome…and you are so right…we have to be open to receive! I still have days when my heart aches and I question if there was more I could have done but then I think of all the signs that confirm he is around me and I think what more can I ask for? My little boy has no more pain; (he had cushings disease)…he lives on…and he reaches out to me!

    Olga

  83. This isn’t about an animal, but a person actually. My grandmother’s uncle was in his 90s and by himself since he had no other family. We helped him for about 5 years now by visiting and getting stuff for him. Unfortunately, he fell one day while trying to fix his refrigerator and had to be in the hospital and nursing home for rehab. He passed away about a week ago. I have felt so terrible about the whole situation especially since we could’ve tried to help with his refrigerator. Do you believe he is doing ok now?

    1. He certainly is doing okay now! Please forgive yourself – you must do that! – because while grief naturally fades, guilt often gets worse. You did nothing wrong and he never has blamed you, so please allow yourself to be at peace! He is having a wonderful time now, and he will be waiting for you when you make your own transition. No worries at all!

  84. One of my cats is extremely shy and scared of people. He is even scared of some of my other cats. He has been this way since he was born. I have always tried to pet him. When he was a little kitten, he let me pet him and even bring him in the house sometimes, but now no one can even go up close to him unless there is food around. He always leaves for 3-7 days but always comes back. I am worried because it has been 2 weeks since I have seen him. Last time I saw him my other cat fought him, so he left. I have prayed everyday that I will find him and he is ok. I am afraid that something bad has happened to him. Anyway, I was wondering if he would come to me when I get to Heaven. I love him so very much and hope that I will get to see him again.

    1. Hello Hannah! I see that you have commented a second time, and I will answer you there. I’m sorry, but I have been traveling. I have finally reached a point where I have literally more to do in each day than can get done if I also take time to sleep ;-).

  85. Roberta,
    Will we meet feral cats in Heaven? My cat is extremely shy and he ran away because another cat was fighting with him. I have no idea where he is, so I’m afraid he may be dead. He has never been gone this long. I love him so very much.

    1. Dear Hannah, the connection is love-based so that alone will mean that your cat is waiting for you in the afterlife if indeed he has transitioned. Either he is there now and happily waiting for you, or someone else is caring for him now so he is safe; but either way, he is perfectly fine, so please be at peace!!

      1. I wasn’t sure if my first message sent so I decided to send it again. I know I shouldn’t worry, but I get more worried each day that I don’t see him. Just when I wasn’t worried about him for not coming home, he comes up missing for longer than he ever has. He has always came to eat for 3-7 days and goes away for that amount of time as well. I think my other cat spooked him when they fought, and I am so afraid that coyotes may have gotten him because I have seen him go in the woods before. I pray every day that I will see him and that he is safe.

        1. I forgot to add above that someone thought they saw him last week, but there are a few other cats the same color. I hope it was him. It just makes me upset that some say I shouldn’t worry about him because he is just a cat…

        2. Dear Hannah, he is certainly safe! You have got to stop feeling guilty – there is nothing you could have done to change the outcome, short of locking him up, and that would have upset him very much. And he is safe now, even if a coyote did get him! His life is eternal, he is healthy and happy, and he is waiting for you. So please be at peace!

          1. I just wanted to let you know I had a dream about my cat last night. Maybe this means I will find him soon, but I had a feeling that he is fine wherever he’s at.

  86. My pet bunny, Monika, died last night. She was 8 years old. She was sick and i tried to keep her alive with medication but i suppose i couldn’t do anything more. People around me say “she was just a pet”, but she was really important to me and i loved her so much. She always loved hugs and could sit on my lap for hours. I have so many fond memories of her. The sad thing is she was a gift from my ex-girlfriend, a woman i also loved much but for some reason she abandoned me almost 3 years ago. I feel as though a whole chapter of my life just died alongside my bunny. I am not sure if i really believe in animal afterlife, but i am sure that the thought i will hold my bunny in my arms again is comforting. I hope she is doing well, wherever she is.

    1. Bob, please be comforted! The evidence is that every animal we ever have loved is waiting for us when we die, now young and healthy. All of them! For me, that waiting friend is the horse I owned and loved for nearly 30 years. I think part of what you are mourning now is that lost human relationship, and I can’t help you there; but where Monika is concerned, indeed, all is well!

  87. Hi Roberta,

    Is there any chance you could send me these books you speak of.

    Had to help my 11 1/2 Border Terrier to sleep on the 17th due to illness and think these books could help me.

    Thank You

    1. Hello Sophie! As I’m sure you realize, for me to be sending books to everyone who asks for one would bankrupt me in short order! But if you will send me a message through the contact block on robertagrimes.com and tell me which book you would like and why you are unable to purchase it on Amazon.com, I will do what I can. I’m sorry about the loss of your dog, but please be assured to know that the little love now really is fine!

  88. Hello,
    Sadly, one week ago we had to let go of our 17 year old bichon named Kassa. He was our “family” dog – we got him as a family (my mom, dad, sister, & myself) when he was 9 weeks old and since we were adults living in different homes, he shuttled from one home to another so everyone could LOVE him. We always lived on the same block so everyone saw him everyday. He was always with his humans, always speaking to him – he understood us. Many things happened over the 17 years, more dogs, marriages, kids – Kassa was there for it all. Eventually I moved a few miles away – but in the same city & my parents moved in my building – so I continued to see Kassa. At this point Kassa was about 12 and it was best for him to stay in my parents home but my toddlers & myself would come over to see him (it was only 3 floors up). He developed what was thought to be dementia, arthritis, and ongoing allergies, he had patella surgery at 7 years old. Then 11 months ago my mother moved closer to my sister & the dogs went with her so I didn’t see Kassa every day anymore – more like a few times a month. These last 11 months his decline was so rapid that we were left no choice. My grief is beyond words.

    Some background on Kassa himself – he was badly bred and came with a host of issues – chewed on himself continually – aggressive towards people and most other dogs which made it impossible to take him to social settings (dogs parks, parties, not even a pet portrait place) trained him twice to no avail, medications didn’t work on his “allergies”, or, on his not so good behavior – at 12 years old I took him to a dermatologist who suggested, after all the years of trying to stop the itching, scratching and chewing on himself, that there is a neurological component. Sadly he wore an e-collar for most of his adult life to stop the chewing. Because of his behavioral issues, whether real allergies which he chewed himself continuously or part of a neurological issue – it became impossible to walk on leash (it was always hard, but it became just torture for him & us) at 12 years old he became in indoor-only dog. This was the same time that his days & nights got mixed up and for periods of time he barked all night and slept all day – medication stemmed that for a while but then no more. He still lived another 5 years. With every bump in the road – our feelings for him never changed.

    Through all of this he was our first dog, we had no expectations, and we loved him, as we hope he loved us. When in our homes, he slept in the beds with us, very affectionate to us, and this is how we were.

    So my grief comes from guilt as to times I didn’t give him that extra treat, that extra lap sitting, that extra pet on the head, when I told him no for different things through the years, etc… and now I cannot do it again. Did he know I love him????

    Did he remember me well – I spent 16 years with him – did he remember those times??? If he remembers those 16 years (95% of his life) he would know how much I love him. Or did he just know me as the person who came every week or 2, to see him???? He did have dementia so I am not sure he remembered anything from his life.

    I was looking for a sign, I have read my grief is too great now for a dream????

    I just want to know that Kassa did love me and that he KNOWS I loved him so much. I know my mom was his favorite because she fed him. But we were all his pack members – his family!!!! I have over 1,000 pictures of us – so many of me hugging him, he on my lap, etc…. I feel like I took for granted our time together, never imagining he would not physically be here. I was the only one in the room with him at the end – no one else could bear it – neither could I but I would not/could not let him be alone. I hope he is OK now, and that he comes back to tell me he knows I love him.

    Sorry this is so long. Thank you.

    1. Dear Suzye, you MUST forgive yourself! Grief is a natural process that generally runs its course in about a year, but if it is complicated by guilt, some people never really get over it! Of course he loves you! And he died at what was a good old age for a dog – you are lucky that he survived for that long. Now he is young and healthy again, and he is happily playing with other dogs while he waits for your family to transition after him. Please forgive yourself, and know that even if you never spot a sign from him, he does still love you very much!

  89. Hi,
    Three weeks ago today I lost my Toby. A Bichon who lived one week short of his 17th birthday. He was a fighter. Over his life he pancreatitis at age 5, recovered beautifully. At age 13 he had a slipped disk. He recovered beautifully, again. For the slipped disk I brought him to the vet once a week for cold laser treatment, it helped him tremendously in fact, when he would come home after the treatment he would run around the living room making his grumbling sound which he always made when running happily. He also started having seizures after receiving a shot from the vet. I always took him to a holistic vet.mToby was put on anti-seizures Meds and shortly after the vet started wening him off the drug. He recovered and never took the drug again. There were other smaller issues which I won’t mention but the last was kidney disease. It started around November of 2017. He was doing great until 4 weeks ago. On his last day he looked at me very sadly and I knew it was not fair to keep him in pain.

    I miss him so much I can’t stop crying.

    So, I’ve had 5 visits from Toby so far. The first was the night he died when I laid in bed I heard him snort (he slept with me) forgetting he was gone I turned to look at him, only to remember he’s gone. The second, was February 16th was his birthday. I was sitting in my car constantly crying , I looked into the sky and a very big, very clearly detailed bunch of clouds formed into Toby’s body. He was so detailed I was in shock. It was a profile of his entire clone-like body and he was running. I was in such deep shock it didn’t even dawn on me pick up my phone to take a picture. I was frozen. The third, was I was pondering where to place his ashes when I got them. I spoke out loud to him saying ‘Toby where should I put your ashes in the other bedroom where you would look out the window or would you rather be in my bedroom’ as I was saying ‘in my bedroom’ I heard him chirp it was clear but faint like from a distance. He would sometimes chirp when trying to get my attention. So in my bedroom he sits. The fourth time, he used to run around the dining table which is on carpet, off white. Before his death there no noticeable running tracks. One week after he’s gone I was stunned to a running track exactly as he would run. A week later the track is no longer there. The fifth time was last night. I had a dream. He was surrounded by clouds and his face from the neck up was looking down on me. I woke immediately which is good so I would remember the dream.

    I know he’s sending me signs but I can’t stop crying. I’m happy for him and I keep telling him how happy I am for him and to have fun and run like you used to.

    That’s Toby’s story. He was a special, strong willed dog that wanted to live. I do not have guilt although at first I did. The loss is just to great.

  90. Thank you for sharing your writing. You are doing a lot of people a lot of good by helping us all realize the fact that our beloved animal kin have just transitioned and are waiting to be with us again when we transition as well. I had to authorize to have my cat Skooben put to sleep yesterday over the phone. I have been out of town for a few months staying with family and was very much looking forward to coming home to him next week. His health rapidly declined in the past week and he was collapsing and could not get up. It’s been devastating to me. I love him deeply and I have such wonderful memories. I also feel some guilt. I wish I could have been a better person with him at all times. I also wish I could have been there to hold him in his final moments.

    Yesterday within the few hours of his passing I felt a warm glow in my chest while thinking about him and grieving for my loss of him. I felt this a few times. I also felt the weight of him laying against me in bed. I told him that I love him and that I want him to go and enjoy his new existence there in the spirit realm. I haven’t felt anything like that since then. I hope he hasn’t gone away. I hope to be reunited with him when my physical body fulfills its term. I want the best for him and his spiritual growth, but I really hope that I’ll be able to share lucid moments of togetherness with him again when the time comes.

    1. All will be well, Bryan! It’s the love between you that makes the attachment. But you really must forgive yourself now, because a sense of guilt often complicates our grief for a pet (or for a child), and can make it harder for us to get past that grief. I have never heard of a single animal communication in which a pet was anything but extremely grateful – they never blame us for anything. So please forgive yourself, and be at peace!

  91. Hi,
    Three weeks ago today I lost my Toby. A Bichon who lived one week short of his 17th birthday. He was a fighter. Over his life he pancreatitis at age 5, recovered beautifully. At age 13 he had a slipped disk. He recovered beautifully, again. For the slipped disk I brought him to the vet once a week for cold laser treatment, it helped him tremendously in fact, when he would come home after the treatment he would run around the living room making his grumbling sound which he always made when running happily. He also started having seizures after receiving a shot from the vet. I always took him to a holistic vet.mToby was put on anti-seizures Meds and shortly after the vet started wening him off the drug. He recovered and never took the drug again. There were other smaller issues which I won’t mention but the last was kidney disease. It started around November of 2017. He was doing great until 4 weeks ago. On his last day he looked at me very sadly and I knew it was not fair to keep him in pain.

    I miss him so much I can’t stop crying.

    So, I’ve had 5 visits from Toby so far. The first was the night he died when I laid in bed I heard him snort (he slept with me) forgetting he was gone I turned to look at him, only to remember he’s gone. The second, was February 16th was his birthday. I was sitting in my car constantly crying , I looked into the sky and a very big, very clearly detailed bunch of clouds formed into Toby’s body. He was so detailed I was in shock. It was a profile of his entire clone-like body and he was running. I was in such deep shock it didn’t even dawn on me pick up my phone to take a picture. I was frozen. The third, was I was pondering where to place his ashes when I got them. I spoke out loud to him saying ‘Toby where should I put your ashes in the other bedroom where you would look out the window or would you rather be in my bedroom’ as I was saying ‘in my bedroom’ I heard him chirp it was clear but faint like from a distance. He would sometimes chirp when trying to get my attention. So in my bedroom he sits. The fourth time, he used to run around the dining table which is on carpet, off white. Before his death there no noticeable running tracks. One week after he’s gone I was stunned to a running track exactly as he would run. A week later the track is no longer there. The fifth time was last night. I had a dream. He was surrounded by clouds and his face from the neck up was looking down on me. I woke immediately which is good so I would remember the dream.

    I know he’s sending me signs but I can’t stop crying. I’m happy for him and I keep telling him how happy I am for him and to have fun and run like you used to.

    That’s Toby’s story. He was a special, strong willed dog that wanted to live. I do not have guilt although at first I did. The loss is just too great.

    1. I forgot to mention, during his life a hawk tried to pick him up and take him away. Luckily, Toby was the winner, again.

    2. It’s terrific that you have already had visits and signs, and it’s a bit unusual to get them so quickly. Thank you for sharing your story here!

  92. Dear Roberta,
    My beautiful companion Bonnie had to be put to sleep 4 days ago on the 1st March 2018 and my heart is so broken. I cannot stop crying for her and looking at videos of her and photos.
    She was 15 years and 8 months old and she was a fluffy white westie cross with Scottish terrier, Maltese and bichon. I had her in my life since she was 8 weeks old and I have never loved or been loved like this before by an animal.
    She was everything to me .
    I loved my parents but when they died, the grief I felt for them could not compare to the crippling grief I feel for Bonnie right now.
    She had had a long series of battles, Cushings disease, severe arthritis and lastly what caused her death, severe kidney disease.
    She was diagnosed with kidney disease in June 2017 and she had twice weekly visits to the vet for fluid injections. She was on organic chinese herbs to purify her blood and kidneys and I had to syringe them in her mouth 3 times a day. I feel guilty for putting her through that . She also had organic food and fruit and vegetables and phosphorus binders mixed in her food so that it would bypass her kidneys.
    My vet was amazed that she lived so long with kidney disease because she originally only gave her a few months but last weekend she stopped eating and started vomiting and was very very tired and looked at me with such sad eyes.
    My vet said it was time and we had previously arranged for her to come to my house to put her to sleep. My son came up from interstate to be with me and to see her one last time.
    I sat her on my lap and told her how much I loved her and nursed her when my vet administered the injection firstly to put her to sleep and then the second injection which stopped her heart. I couldnt see her face and I feel so guilty that it might have been a shock to her to go so suddenly.
    I stayed with her on my lap until Pets Eternal came to pick her up which was another 30 minutes but too soon because I wanted to hold her and not let her go. I carried her to their van crying my heart out.
    The next day I called and asked if I could see her one more time before she was cremated that afternoon and I went there in the morning and held her little cold body and cried over her again.
    It is now 4 days and her ashes will be returned to me this week but I feel so devasted and lost without her.
    I have not had any visitations from her and desperately need them.
    I just want to know that she knows that she was my world, we had been through so much together and I want to know that she can see me and knows that I love and miss her and that she will be waiting for me and we will be together forever.
    thank you for reading this
    Briony

    1. Briony, please understand that your little friend is perfectly fine, still loves you, is grateful that you gave her a peaceful death, and will be waiting to see you again when you transition! All really is well, and love is eternal ;-).

  93. Yes, I know without a doubt that all livings things have a personal essence. My passed beloved Terrier’s essence might sleep sometimes, stay alone sometimes, think on different things/conditions/feelings etc. by herself, but her memories in me are living things. One day my soul will meet her more often, more joyful, especially/probably when I also pass to the next life where she is now. Peace just happens at times forever.

    1. Jeff, you should know, too, that we all astral-travel at night while our bodies sleep, and we often meet with dead loved ones. It is likely that you and your little friend are still spending regular time together, even long before you eventually transition to where she is now!

  94. Roberta, my friend and I lost who I called my baby girl. she was a 14 year old tiny dog who had no bad bone in her darling body. She died at the vets after being locked somehow in the outside toilet at the back where she couldn’t be found for 26 hours ad ingested lots of sewerage. I am having trouble coming to terms with this as I felt my friend should have made it dog proof. I am devistated beyond belief. i am angry at my ‘friend’ My baby should not have died like that. She lasted a few hours at the vet and died. Please tell me she will meet me when I go. Thank you

    1. Rhonda, your little friend is fine! She will be waiting for you when eventually you, too, go home. But you really must forgive your friend, and forgive yourself: this was an accident, and holding onto this anger can only harm you. Please!

  95. I just lost my pet dog of 16 years. Her name is Savannah. She is love of my life about 5 weeks ago. She was in the hospital for stomach surgery. about She passed on about 3 days after the surgery just could not get over all the stress and medications form the surgery. Being 16 years old had something to do with this. I am having such a hard time getting over here passing. I do believe she has visited me a couple of times I heard here bark the first time and then on another day she came to me. I did not physically see her but felt here presence so strong. I knelt on the floor and she came into my arms. I could here here talking as I would here a human voice speaking to me. she was talking to me and I could understand what she was saying. She told me about her passing and all the pain she went through. I understood everything she was saying. Sometimes I see a shadow of her but she is as a young puppy. I feel so lonely without here here..I am so looking forward being with here again and never to be parted again.. She was such a sweet soul. She was my angle.

    1. Arthur, I’m glad you have had such great communications from your little friend! Of course, you know that she lived to a good old age for a dog, right? And you would never have wanted her to suffer. So please just be at peace, go on with your life, and when you see her again she will be young and healthy forevermore!

  96. Roberta,
    Last week I lost a very special kitten. She was born here and was doing so good until about mid-February when her rectum prolapsed. I took her to the vet, but they wanted to euthanize her. I just couldn’t bring myself to let them do it, but they made me feel guilty by saying she would suffer for the rest of her life. She lived over a month like that, but died last week. I wanted to help her. Do you think she knows I really did love her? I’m so sad and miss her very much! I have had dreams about her since and feel that she is ok and with all my other beloved pets who have already gone on.

    1. Nina, she is fine! Love is eternal, and you really must forgive yourself for something that was not your fault. The tie is love, and she certainly knows that you love her. You will see her again once you transition. All is well!!

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  98. Roberta, I will be moving residence at some point. Will Toby be able to find and follow me? Is there anything I can do to to make sure he can find me in a different house, like leave him messages or bring something that belonged to him or will he know no matter what? Thank you.
    Christine

    1. Christine, our beloved animals who have gone ahead locate us by our consciousness vibrations, which are unique to us. Toby could find you, no matter where you are!

  99. Hi Roberta,

    I lost my dog a little over a year ago and I have struggled every day since. I don’t have a big family and very few friends so Alex was what I considered my best friend! I made the mistake of going to the internet and asking “do our pets go to heaven” most answers were “no, animals don’t go to heaven” as you can imagine, this has devastated me and I don’t know what to do with myself. I just need reassurance that I will see my dog in the afterlife!!

    1. Dear Steph, “heaven” is a religious word, and you can see just how loving and compassionate these Christians are when you see how readily they will trash all your hopes! But they are wrong. We have nearly 200 years of abundant and consistent afterlife evidence, and one of the things of which we are most certain based upon the evidence is that every animal we ever have loved is waiting for us in the afterlife, now young and healthy! No worries, dear. Alex is fine, and still loves you very much!!

  100. Roberta, I found one of my favorite cats dead this morning. It has really broken my heart. I always feed my cats at the barn in the morning and at night. I noticed that I hadn’t seen her in 2-3 days, but I just thought she was with her kittens (I’m not sure what happened to them now). She had her head stuck in a planter, and I didn’t know til today. I could have saved her if I had known. She was only 3 years old. I feel so devastated!! I didn’t get to spend as much time with her lately because I knew she had kittens, but I picked her up and petted her the last time I saw her alive. I hope she knew how much I loved her, and I hope she wasn’t in pain. It hurts to look at her. I miss her so much! I’ll never forget her. Will I get to see her again someday?

    1. Karie, I’m so sorry for your grief. Please recognize, though, that this grief is complicated by a substantial dose of guilt, and that is dangerous for you since guilt-grief doesn’t always subside naturally over months of time. For some, it can be there forever! And you don’t want that. Please, for your own sake, forgive yourself! Get rid of or fence off the planter so no other cat can be harmed by it; know that outdoor cats just naturally have shorter lifespans, even though they are happier; send your little friend your love, and bury her with flowers; and then for heaven’s sake, forgive yourself and go on with your life!!

      it is the love-tie between us and our animal companions that ensures that they will be happy and healthy and waiting for us when eventually we transition, so keep sending your little friend loving thoughts for awhile. If you do love her, then indeed you will see her again!

  101. I went to the grocery store today, and I found one of my cats run over when I got back (thankfully, he doesn’t look hurt). He was less than a year old. I’ve never seen him go down the road before, but I feel so bad because I live close to a race track, and if I had stayed here I could’ve watched him to make sure he didn’t get in the road or I could’ve put him up like I usually do. I hope that he didn’t hurt too much when it happened. I also feel bad because I feel like I spent more time with his siblings than him, but he always followed me around when I went outside. I know I shouldn’t feel guilty, but it hurts so bad. I really did love him, and I hope he knew that. Will I get to see him again someday, and is he ok now?

    1. Dear Emma, all cat parents must make a choice: do I keep my little ones inside and safer, or do I allow them what is (for a cat) the much more enjoyable life of being allowed outside? The statistics are clear: on average, outside cats live much shorter lives. Just weeks ago, someone’s cat that would hang around in our backyard almost daily was caught and mauled by a coyote. He didn’t make it. One of my earliest memories is of watching in horror as my own beloved kitten was run over by my father. Outdoor cats live lives of danger!

      So you gave your cat a happier but riskier life. You cannot live your own life around your cats’ needs without eventually coming to resent them, and even if you had stayed home this one particular time that is no guarantee that you could have prolonged this cat’s life. My family’s cat – now elderly – for the first decade of her indoor life wanted an outdoor life so desperately that eventually we gave up on trying to keep her from escaping. We called it “letting her take her life into her own paws,” and we did it even knowing that we might well end up sharing your experience. Now I never back my car out of the garage without worry, but I do look first and than watch carefully in the mirrors and back out my car. April’s life is in her own paws, and that is as she wants it to be.

      Yes, your cat is fine and healthy and waiting for you! Your real problem is this feeling of guilt, which is unwarranted and which can destroy your life if you don’t find a way to forgive yourself. If you would like a copy of my book on forgiveness, just send me an email through this website.

      1. Thank you! I know they enjoy being outside, so they can do whatever they like. I had an indoors cat who always longed to be outside. She just seemed sad to be indoors, and I would catch her looking out the windows all the time. One of my cats has been an outdoors cat all his life (he is elderly now), and he is just fine! Nothing has ever happened to him. Others, though, don’t get to live that long, and it makes me sad. At least I have good memories, and hopefully someday I’ll be with him again as well as all my other pets.

  102. My dog died last April 30,2018. He was a Yorkie. His name was Moses. He was my first dog and I had him for 6 years. I am still missing him…… It helps reading the comments and knowing I am not alone having this sad and awful feeling losing a pet. It was sudden sickness. I was sad when the vet told me he had pancreatitis last April 6. Monitored put him in a low fat diet, followed all the instructions given by the vet then after a week he was well and running and jumping again. Then after 1 week he began throwing up and whining in pain.. I never wasted any day went to the hospital and the vet told me that he needs to be confined him for 4 days because the result of his blood work was not normal and needs IV fluids…. Kidney got affected…. Everyday visited him and carried him for few minutes……after 4 days…. the vet told me nothing was
    changed and every organ compromised….. I was devastated and cried when I got the news….. I brought him home….. Spent at least 6 days(took some days off from work) and took good care of him until he passed…… I am still hurting….. and looking for the signs……I don’t know if these are the signs…..After he died….. In my room I felt chills…… then 3 consecutive nights waking up before 3 am felt warmth around me….. I want him to visit me in my dreams….. I want to know if he is ok…..

    1. Dear Bam, of course your little friend is fine! He is happy and healthy and waiting for you now in a beautiful place where love never ends. It will be very important that you kill any feelings of guilt you might have, since you did everything you could, and feeling guilty would needlessly prolong your grief. Just keep sending little Moses your love, and once you have gotten past the worst of your grief you should begin to get better communications from him. In the meantime, I am sending you a big hug!

    1. Hello Linda! I’m sorry about your loss, but please be assured that your little friend is fine. I can’t recall specifically answering another comment from you, but please understand that I spend a good part of many days now just answering comments and emails!

      1. Hi Roberta, My Poppy was attacked by my dog a month ago. my dog who has spent 7 years living with a few cats in our home with no problems, just picked her up and shook her and she died in my arms on the way to the vets. Poppy was a beautiful old lady cat who appeared from nowhere 7 years ago, always terrified of people, I loved her so and have been bereft since. I could not keep her safe in our garden. My dog has gone to live with my son as I have other cats. I miss Poppy so, she was beautiful, would be chatty when I would call her name and would sleep in my right arm at night. If only I could change the past. Will she forgive me for not keeping her safe? can she feel my love still? will I see her again? I would love to feel her presence but fear I may be hindering because of my grief. Oh Roberta, I need to make peace with this but I miss her so and I am sobbing again.

        1. Dear Linda, YOU MUST FORGIVE YOURSELF!! You did absolutely nothing wrong; you were a loving pet-parent, and she had an unfortunate accident.

          As you might suspect from the comments here, I hear daily from people who are in grief because of the loss of a pet. And so often people feel a lot of guilt associated with the death! Either they took the dying pet to the vet, or they didn’t take the dying pet to the vet. Either they would never let the pet go outside and it was sad; or they did let the pet go outside and it died in an accident.

          Dear Linda and everyone, unless you are already extremely old when you are reading this, EVERY ONE OF YOUR ANIMAL FRIENDS IS GOING TO DIE BEFORE YOU DO!

          The wonderful news is that all the animals we ever have loved and lost are young and healthy again, and happily waiting for us in a beautiful place where love never ends; but the bad news is that you have the power to destroy the rest of your life and even to damage your own eternity if you never manage to conquer any guilt you might be feeling about an animal’s death. Don’t do that to yourself! And please, please don’t do that to these beautiful fur-babies who are eagerly awaiting you now!

          1. Hi Roberta, I did take your reply on board, have still been struggling. would you believe that Monday morning, 5 days ago. my soul mate Tabby another one of my senior cats got hit and killed outside my home. the young man that hit her came to tell me. my shadow of 11 years. why both in under 3 months. both my girls who would cuddle up with me at night in bed. in all my years of having cats she wasthe oneI had the strongest bond too. Did I make this happen? being so concerned over my cats safety? I guess I am still in shock as I feel dead inside.

          2. Roberta , can I also ask for those animals for whose lives you touch briefly, who otherwise would not have other human bonding what happens to them, I am thinking of feral cats, wildlife and farm animals, pigs and sheep for example. I offer love to them but at times it is fleeting and I wonder if they carry that with them.

            ROBERTA HERE. Your last two comments don’t allow for responses, and they certainly need responses!

            To answer your last question first, every animal that has not sufficiently bonded with a human being returns to what the dead refer to as “a species-specific group soul.” We know that there is an afterlife existence for them because there are plains and forests in the non-material realities that teem with life! We assume that, like us, they reincarnate repeatedly; but unlike us, they are of a different (some of the dead say “a purer”) consciousness, so they don’t need to come to earth to raise their consciousness vibrations as we do. It is my own belief that the animals we love come to our afterlife realities instead of their own in order to help us to further develop, since they love us too; but their destiny is eternal life, wherever they live it. It seems that nothing living (above, we think, the level of insect, lizard, and perhaps reptile) ever dies.

            What I really want to respond to, though, is your obsession with feeling a personal involvement and responsibility in the deaths of your cats. No, you didn’t make those deaths happen! And you feel “dead inside” because in a way you are dead inside: you seem to have invested too much of yourself in animals that were certain to die before you did. I don’t know why their deaths happened, especially since I don’t know you; and it is most likely that those deaths were random. But from what you have said, I suspect that you might possibly be receiving a call from your guides to stop investing so much of your love in your pets and begin to invest more of it in people. It is wonderful to love and care for dogs and cats, and they give us so much in return! But if they are the only living things we love, then we probably cannot use this lifetime to elevate our personal consciousness through interactions with other people. Our animals teach us how to love! But when we are better able to love, it is so important that we make use of the gift they have given to us and begin to invest some of that love in other people, too.

          3. Hi Roberta, Thank you for your replies,
            I would like to clarify why I asked if I may have caused my cats deaths, my neighbour thought I had by being overprotective of them, keeping them safe, that I had caused the opposite to lose them. (sounds crazy but wanted to know that thinking is wrong)
            I think the deadness inside I refer to maybe due to 2 losses in 3 months and yes I was very bonded to them as they were my senior girls that I have had for a long time.
            Surely when you grieve for a loved one that is normal? I have taken in a few youngsters from dire circumstances, I do that out of love as no one else would and they would have perished.
            I do intereact with people but my work now involves animals, so of course I form bonds with them.
            Thank you for the insight into those who’s lives you touch briefly.

            ROBERTA AGAIN –

            Yes, that thinking is wrong! For him to have even suggested that your trying to protect your pets had hastened their deaths was sadistic, when instead he should have been comforting you! And yes, feeling grief for beloved pets is normal; but in my experience it is not normal to feel the same intensity of grief you might feel for people. The sense I have gotten from your comments may be wrong, but ‘dead inside” is an extreme way to react, even to the death of a human loved one! Dear Linda, all our pets live short lives here, so we are going to experience lots of pet-deaths. But if pets have been loved by a human being, they do indeed always transition and they are waiting for us, now young and healthy. So the appropriate reaction is to send them loving thoughts, perhaps bury them nicely or scatter their ashes, and then perhaps give a home and your love to another dog or cat in their place. I really hope you are feeling better!

  103. I just had to put my 14 year old dog to sleep today because her organs were so enlarged it was crushing her breathing tubes. Old age issues said the vet. When my grandmother died in another state i new it because she’s whispered good by in my ear before she went on. My mom died in her sleep at 48 years old unexpected. She Would send butterflies in my face for years. Litterly in my face butterflies all the time. But when i put my little Maltese to sleep i felt a fast release/calmness maybe as long as 2 seconds. I thought she had left her body but she was still breathing in her unthism sleep. I don’t feel her around not even her energy. Does a pet urhinized still go to heaven? Can i dogs soul or energy get trapped in a body if not ready to leave?

    1. Kari, please be comforted. Most beloved pets are given the grace of relief from their terminal pains, and they all do transition just fine! In every case of which I am aware, they tell us they are grateful to their pet-parents for that last trip to the vet; I have never seen even one communication from a beloved pet that said otherwise. Not all people, and not all animals will communicate discernibly after death, but that means nothing significant so please don’t worry about it. And no person or animal ever is trapped in a body! The body disintegrates, after all. Some people may not transition right away, but that is generally related to issues that pets don’t experience. Please be comforted to know that your little friend is now young and happy and waiting for you in a beautiful, earth-like place where love never ends!

  104. Roberta, my favorite cat’s kitten (she is a year old now) just got run over. I have seen her crossing the road many times the last few weeks and going in the field – I guess to chase mice, and it has been so hot here lately. I have been worried that she was going to get run over, but I couldn’t catch her to put her up. There hasn’t been too much traffic lately, so I thought she would be ok. Now I feel guilty. She was always wary of people and ran whenever I tried to get close to her. Just a few days ago she was asleep on the porch. I tried to pet her, but she woke up and ran. My favorite cat (her mom) died a few months ago, so I was hoping I would get to keep her kitten. Do you think they are together now and happy? Do you think she knew I loved her even though she always ran away from me? Will I get to see them and be with them again someday? Sorry for so many questions. I know they are just animals, but it hurts me when one dies and I’m afraid I won’t see them again someday. I’m just glad that she doesn’t have any signs of getting run over and isn’t bleeding, but I feel bad because I made a promise to myself that I would protect her and keep her safe.

    1. Dear Chloe, your most important problem is this guilt you feel! Please, please forgive yourself. She wanted to be free and to go where she liked, and you gave her what she wanted. In my house, we say that our indoor-outdoor cat “takes her life into her own paws.” We know that our decision to let her go outside might shorten her life, but we think that her happiness is more important. Forgive yourself completely! You were a lovely pet-parent to both cat and kitten, and they are safe now and together and happy, so really, all is well. Meanwhile, I’m sending you a hug!

      1. Thank you! I now know who ran over her and why. There was another cat in the road with her, and he couldn’t dodge both of them. I guess she was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I will miss her tremendously, but it comforts me to know that they are together now, safe and happy. I just wish it could have been prevented.

  105. Hi Roberta, my beloved dog Scottie was diagnosed with a tumor on his spleen. We took him to the vet because he was panting and breath heavily in the night. On two occasions he all of a sudden let a a small yelp and was looking near his backside. His ears were back and he was on high alert looking around turning his head this way and that like he was looking for someone. There was no one around or any that touched him. He had a border collie companion who passed in November. She always would nip him on the behind and try to herd him. Is it possible that was her? I am devastated by his diagnosis and do not know how much longer he will be here with us.

    1. Yes, Melissa, that certainly could have been a reaction to a “nip” from your border collie! What a wonderful sign that would be! I wondered whether perhaps it also could be a reaction to internal pain, but it really is more likely to have been a nip since otherwise the pain would likely be more consistent – it wouldn’t have happened just twice. Your border collie friend really is well and happy, and so will your Scottie be when he happily graduates. So please be happy for them!

      1. Thank you for your response. I liked to think that was his friend Bella but a day later he started having seizures as his blood glucose was very low ( unfortunately we did not find this out until it was too late) he had issues with his heart as well as a large mass on his spleen. He was scheduled for surgery on Monday but on Friday he started having seizures and the vet had a hard time getting him out of them. They would operate that night on him but there wouldn’t be anyone there with him through the night and with all his other complications there was a chance he wouldn’t make it. I made the difficult choice to let him go. I couldn’t take the chance that he could be suffering and die alone in a cage. He was abused as a puppy and never fully got over it and had bad separation anxiety. I have struggled with did I do the right thing, should I have fought more for him? I truly want to believe he still lives on somewhere and I will see him and my other dogs again but I’m somewhat skeptical. I am besides myself with grief, I grieved my other dogs but Scottie was my soul dog. I miss him and my Benny and Bella so much.

  106. Dear Melissa and everyone, please understand and take comfort in these facts!

    1) A dog’s life on earth can last for maybe fifteen years. And it is not uncommon for a human being to live five or six times as long! So if you choose to have beloved dogs in your life, you are going to have a lot of them predecease you. “A puppy is pain in a fur wrapper.” Never forget that fact, and enjoy the time you have together without letting yourself be destroyed by these inevitable deaths!

    2) Every dog that you ever have loved is waiting for you now, young and healthy and happy. Every dog that you ever have loved is fine!

    3) Every post-death communication from a dog that was euthanized due to illness, injury, or old age expresses a lot of gratitude to pet-parents who made the right decision. Every one of them!

    So please, dear Melissa and everyone else who is reading these words, don’t give your departed dogs the pain of seeing you suffering over their deaths! Instead, kiss them and give them release from their pain, knowing with certainty that this separation is going to be brief. Knowing beyond doubt that life is eternal, and in truth love never ends….

  107. I lost my beautiful 14 year old aussie baby boy yesterday, two days after he had his first known seizure. I am completely in despair and heartbroken right now. I am also wracked with feelings of not knowing if I did everything I could to change his outcome. The only consolation I have is that he passed at home in my arms while we were lying out in the backyard versus on a cold vet table. I am searching for any consolation that he is in a better place and that I will not only see him but all my other furbabies I’ve lost in the past. Thank you for this blog as it is giving me some of that comfort. I’m finally starting to not hear the howling noise he was making during the hours leading up to his transition.

    1. Oh my goodness, Reyna, of course he is fine! The evidence is abundant and consistent that every animal we ever have loved is waiting for us, now young and healthy, and since there is no time where our beloved animals are, it will seem to them as if we are arriving there right behind them! So please be comforted, and above all please forgive yourself because feeling guilty can vastly compound the pain of grief and make it much harder to heal and move forward. Forgive yourself, know that he is fine, and look forward happily to holding him in your arm again!

      1. Roberta,

        Thanks so much for the quick response. The day continues to be challenging, but I am reading so many encouraging blogs and websites. I even watched one of your interviews about the fun of dying. I am realizing that I really need to do more soul searching and spirituality growing before I can really get past events like this successfully. I take anti-anxiety medication for my ongoing inability to cope with the unknown, particularly when it comes to health issues for me and my loved ones. This began after I lost my father 13 years ago and has caused me to lose alot of my former zeal and zest for life. I am really hoping to gain that back one day.

        1. Reyna, your problem is that you are living a fear-based and not a love-based life. It has to be one or the other, since fear and love are polar opposites. My book, The Fun of Growing Forever, might be of help to you; if you will contact me through this website, I will be happy to send it to you in PDF.

          1. Roberta,

            Your words certainly do resonate with me. Please let me know if there is some other way besides this response that I need to use to get the pdf. And thank you so much for your concern and interest in my well-being.

  108. hi, my old girl died 2 yrs ago. Exactly a week to the day of her death I went to our favourite place with my other dog and captured an image of a puppy in the grass by my scoooter, (it looked transparent in the photo, there was nothing there to see to the naked eye) it didn’t look like her though, so I wondered if she was trying to tell me this was what she would look like when she reincarnated? I’ve had 2 visitations in dreams where she appeared as she looked her last 15 yrs, one last year and one more recently so I guess she is still in spirit. I’m not sure why she’s waiting and hasn’t come back yet, maybe because of my other dog?
    I’m nearly 50 though so hoping she’s not going to wait another 10 yrs if my current dog lives to the same age, before she returns. I’m beginnning to wonder if she knows I’ve got cancer or something and wouldn’t be around for her full lifetime if she came back, can they know stuff like that from the other side?

    1. KT, very few of our beloved animals will reincarnate into our present lifetime. It does happen, but it is rare! No, your having another dog would not deter her. It is more likely, though, that she is just trying to let you know that she is there and waiting for you, now again young and healthy, so please just take comfort from that and look forward to having her greet you with joy on the eventual day when your work here is completed and you will get to go home!

  109. Roberta, I found my cat walking close to a ditch yesterday. She was very muddy and weak. I brought her in the house, but she wouldn’t eat or drink. No vets were open, or I would’ve taken her. I’m not sure what happened to her. She used to stay here all the time, but a year or two ago she started staying across the road. She would come over every now and then to eat, but a few months ago she stopped coming. I would see her every so often when I passed by. When I brought her in yesterday, she seemed dizzy, but she walked around and even climbed onto the bed. Late yesterday evening she couldn’t even stand up or walk. I was going to keep her in the house, but decided to put her outside. I’m not sure why I decided to do that. I couldn’t find her all day until a few minutes ago. She was laying in the same spot across the road where I usually saw her, but she was dead! I don’t know how she walked all the way over there. She seemed so weak last night. I just wish I could’ve helped her more. I hope she knew how much I loved her. She was so special to me. Do you think she is alright now?

    1. She is fine! Cats are more peculiar animals than dogs, more difficult for us to understand, and occasionally they are so independent that they prefer to be off on their own this way. That you didn’t try to impose your will on her was a gift to her, and that she perhaps picked up a germ or was grazed by a car or otherwise suffered harm in the course of her self-chosen life was not your fault. But the animals we love do transition to the afterlife that we will share with them, and she is perfectly find there now!

  110. Friday night my 6 year old neutered male cat attacked my sweet 9 month old female cat out of the blue, we made the mistake of thinking vet care was not necessary. the weirdest part is they were friends & i do not understand why he attacked her. She died 6 hours later in our living room, the guilt for not taking her is eating me alive & hurts so badly but there is no way to know if they could have helped her, i swear yesterday while cooking i saw her by the stairs, my boyfriend who she was closest with has been seeing her in dreams & in our home but with no eyes & a black face? I want closure so badly & to know that she knew how much we loved her & that she will be there for us when our time comes. Help me understand, why would he see her this way? Is there animosity? Could someone coming into our home to try to communicate with her help?

    1. Amanda, it is imperative that you and your boyfriend forgive yourselves! Grief is a straightforward emotion that gradually heals, but if we allow it to become complicated by our feelings of guilt it will literally NEVER heal! Don’t do that to yourselves!

      Since the black face and eyes appear only in his dreams, it is probable that none of it means anything. He is doing what you are doing, and assuming that the cat is angry with you and dreaming of the cat being angry, when there has never been a case to my knowledge when a cat or dog who has gone on ahead has expressed anger. Their universal sentiments are consistently love and gratitude! This assuming that your anger at yourselves must be also felt by the cat is called displacement, and it means nothing and helps no one.

      There are indeed good animal communicators, and they wouldn’t need to come to your home to help you. If you would like me to suggest someone who might be able to help, please just email me through the contact block on this website.

  111. Hi Roberta,
    Thank you for this website, I am comforted by many of the posts. In your August 11, 2018 response to Linda you stated:

    “….feeling grief for beloved pets is normal; but in my experience it is not normal to feel the same intensity of grief you might feel for people. ”

    I’m not sure one can compare grief or decide what is ‘normal’. I have lost several loved ones, human and canine, in the past two years. The grief I feel for each is individual, and not based on their species. I just wanted to point this out in case Linda felt that her grief was somehow not ‘normal’. Love is love, and ‘normal’ will differ for every loss. Sending love to all.

    1. It is true that we all experience grief differently, but my problem is that I hear from so many people in grief and I have come to conclude that in fact there IS a basic difference in what is usual. There is a range, yes, since we are all unique people; but in general in my experience grief for a beloved pet has the following characteristics:

      1) We adopt our fur-babies with the near-certainty that we will outlive them. A friend of mine calls puppies “pain in a fur wrapper,” and that is exactly what they are: unless we are old at their adoption, the day will come when they will die while we live on. We know that from the start! But on the other hand, when a child or a beloved contemporary dies, that feels like a tragic wrenching of events out of order. And it should feel that way.

      2) We can – and usually do – adopt and soon love a new dog or cat, so the physical hole in our lives can be filled. With a child or spouse, on the other hand, there is usually no filling that hole. When you lose a younger person in death, your life must be materially changed.

      3) Everyone who has contacted me who was distraught over the loss of a pet was burdened by guilt. I cannot now think of an exception. But by contrast, those who lose a child or a spouse might have regrets, but they haven’t been as anguished by guilt and they seem to handle it much better. I am struck by just how guilty some grieving pet-parents feel! “He couldn’t tell me what he needed so I let it go on too long,” or “I ignored the signs,” or “I didn’t take him to the vet soon enough,” or “I euthanized him too soon!” And on and on. Guilt like this is not normal grief, and it will not easily fade.

      Now, granted, my sample is a few hundred people so it is possible that it is skewed; but I don’t think it is. I am pretty confident now that grief for a beloved pet that is uncomplicated by feelings of guilt is more easily dealt with than is grief for a human loved one lost. And please, if you are reading this and you feel any guilt at all about a deceased beloved pet, please know for certain that your pet does not blame you! I am not aware of any post-death pet communication ever received in which that pet was anything but grateful to its owner… and they are especially grateful for your selfless gift in taking them to the vet and ending their suffering. Your beloved little friend is now young again and happy and waiting eagerly for you in a perfect eternal world where love never ends!

  112. Our beloved 10 year old cat Chappie was diagnosed with final stage kidney failure in May. We did the best we could for him, giving him IV treatments, etc, but he got worse and on Tuesday night, we had to put him to sleep, here at home.

    Chappie was an indoor cat but just a couple of hours before the Vet was to come over to euthanize him, he looked out the front door, and my wife took him out on the porch and held him, giving him his last wish. A yellow butterfly flew close by and he innocently followed it with his eyes. I got it on video and it is both beautiful and sad. I weep when I think about it.

    Two hours later the vet pulled up the driveway and my wife was crying as she carried him down the stairs. It was time. He left us as he lied on the living room couch and his body was taken away.

    I cannot tell you how much I have wept since this special cat has left. A big void has been created. I have some guilt about not being able to do more for him or maybe even diagnosing his condition much sooner. Mostly, though, I miss my friend.

    1. Dale, it may surprise you to know that what you are experiencing is not simple grief, but it is grief complicated by feelings of guilt. Every case of such desperate grief as yours that I ever have seen was compounded by severe guilt and regret, and I am sorry to say that while grief will ease naturally, what you are going through may not ease much at all unless you will proactively fight it! I urge you strongly to:

      1) Forgive yourself. Your little friend forgives you, never blamed you anyway, and is young and happy and waiting for you now where love truly never ends.

      2) find a rescue cat to love, preferably not one that looks like Chappie but definitely one that needs you. Consider your giving this little homeless one a home to be your gift to Chappie, and lavish him or her with all the love you want to give to the cat you have been separated from just temporarily.

      Heal your guilt and remorse, Dale! Or else it may burden the rest of your life.

  113. Thanks, Roberta.

    I’m happy to say the guilt is better than it was a couple of days ago. What happened to me 12 years ago after another cat of mine passsed has helped me and maybe it will help others in some way.

    In 2006: three weeks after Sheba’s passing: I am getting ready to fall asleep on my bed; it’s after midnight, and for whatever reason, I was feeling particularly sad over Sheba, even feeling guilt that I put her to sleep. I even said aloud, “I’m sorry Sheba….Sheba, give me some sign that you’re okay.”

    After getting composed, I said aloud something like, “God, I wish you’d give me a sign that Sheba’s okay.” I don’t know what I was expecting.

    I turned out the lights, put my head on the pillow, and no more than ten minutes later the electrical power goes completely off in my bedroom—my fan and small electrical nightlight go off. I’m in complete darkness and silence, and I must admit, it was unnerving at first. Imagine how the average person would feel. I estimate that it was seven minutes later and the electricity comes back on. I find out later the whole house lost electricity for those 5-10 minutes.

    Did my neighbor lose power? I don’t know. Maybe they did too. Maybe there was an auto accident in the area. Someone hit a power line? Whatever happened, it was one whale of a coincidence, wouldn’t you say? Our power doesn’t just go out every night of the week. The power rarely goes off!

    I opened the window and there was no thunderstorm, no high wind, no sirens that would indicate a car accident hit an electric pole (if so, the power would be off for a lot longer than 5 minutes).

    When the power did return, I sat there, and admittedly I was still unnerved, but I was also in awe. It gave me great peace. I believe it was a blessing I received, an answer to prayer. Call me crazy but I believe it was meant to get my attention and . . . it . . . did.

    Thanks, Roberta.
    Dale

    1. Thank you for sharing this! I tend to be troubled by messages like yours – I wish I could find you with a pot of tea and sit with you and talk you through it – so it’s good to know that you are receiving spiritual help. You will be fine!

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